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smothered, feeling extremely smothered by my boyfriend
lollipoplove
post Mar 26 2008, 12:43 PM
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Uggh I deffinately need help with this one. My boyfriend is practically smothering me. He texts me about like every single day and 10 times a day he tells me he loves me...it's frustrating! It's like he's trying too hard to care. It gets really annoying but I don't really wanta tell him that cause' I'm afraid I'll hurt his feelings and he'll think I'm breaking up with him. Which I'm not. I just want to tell him that he needs to back off a little bit but I don't know how....I've never really been in a situation like this before. _unsure.gif
 
 
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brooklyneast05
post Mar 26 2008, 12:56 PM
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tell him, it will just worse if you don't stop it now. you'll be with someone who flips out if you aren't all over them saying i love you every 7 seconds. those kinda people also typically turn extremely jealous at some point.
 
lollipoplove
post Mar 26 2008, 01:15 PM
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yeah I wouldn't want him to turn out like that...
 
illriginal
post Mar 26 2008, 01:29 PM
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QUOTE(lollipoplove @ Mar 26 2008, 01:43 PM) *
Uggh I deffinately need help with this one. My boyfriend is practically smothering me. He texts me about like every single day and 10 times a day he tells me he loves me...it's frustrating! It's like he's trying too hard to care. It gets really annoying but I don't really wanta tell him that cause' I'm afraid I'll hurt his feelings and he'll think I'm breaking up with him. Which I'm not. I just want to tell him that he needs to back off a little bit but I don't know how....I've never really been in a situation like this before. _unsure.gif


=\ That's messed up.. I text my girl a lot like she texts me a lot and we tell each other "i love you" all the time.

Maybe you're just not ready for a relationship in the first place.
 
Heathasm
post Mar 26 2008, 02:39 PM
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QUOTE(Tamacracker @ Mar 26 2008, 01:29 PM) *
=\ That's messed up.. I text my girl a lot like she texts me a lot and we tell each other "i love you" all the time.

Maybe you're just not ready for a relationship in the first place.

ia

i remember i got pissed because i dont have free txt messaging and ended up with a large bill :\
 
illriginal
post Mar 26 2008, 03:04 PM
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QUOTE(Heathasm @ Mar 26 2008, 03:39 PM) *
ia

i remember i got pissed because i dont have free txt messaging and ended up with a large bill :\

lol ouch :X
 
stephinika
post Mar 27 2008, 03:04 AM
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QUOTE(Heathasm @ Mar 26 2008, 12:39 PM) *
ia

i remember i got pissed because i dont have free txt messaging and ended up with a large bill :\

Dang, that sucks.

But yeah, you just have to talk to him and say you need a little more breathing room, but that doesn't seem all that clingy too me, although I've seen and heard of worse so its hard to say. But anyways, just talk to him so you guys can get on the same page.
 
Melie
post Mar 27 2008, 12:16 PM
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QUOTE(brooklyneast05 @ Mar 26 2008, 12:56 PM) *
tell him, it will just worse if you don't stop it now. you'll be with someone who flips out if you aren't all over them saying i love you every 7 seconds. those kinda people also typically turn extremely jealous at some point.

this is very true. sounds to me like he's had some hard times in a previous relationship and you're receiving the bad end of it. but talk to him or else in the future it'll become worse.
 
tokyo-rose
post Mar 27 2008, 03:32 PM
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QUOTE(Tamacracker @ Mar 26 2008, 02:29 PM) *
=\ That's messed up.. I text my girl a lot like she texts me a lot and we tell each other "i love you" all the time.

Maybe you're just not ready for a relationship in the first place.

You're making assumptions again. There's a difference between texting a lot because the couple having an actual conversation versus texting a lot because the guy is worried that his girlfriend is cheating on him and/or wants to reassure himself that she also loves him. It's nice to say "I love you," but it can get tiring to hear it all the time.
 
illriginal
post Mar 27 2008, 04:19 PM
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QUOTE(Synesthesia @ Mar 27 2008, 04:32 PM) *
You're making assumptions again. There's a difference between texting a lot because the couple having an actual conversation versus texting a lot because the guy is worried that his girlfriend is cheating on him and/or wants to reassure himself that she also loves him. It's nice to say "I love you," but it can get tiring to hear it all the time.


Right but she never made any mention about how he's worried that she's cheatin... so what are you talkin about?... Or is that just an assumption you made? rolleyes.gif
 
LoveToMySilas
post Mar 27 2008, 05:06 PM
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I don't wanna sound repetitive, but I agree with the others. I think you should talk to him about it, I mean, hes not a mind reader so he probably doesn't even know that you're feeling this way. Communication is key. _smile.gif
 
DeviantShadows
post Mar 27 2008, 07:09 PM
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Wow, feeling smothered with only 10 texts? blink.gif I get about 30-50 from my boyfriend daily. But I like it, hahah. Yay for unlimited texting.

Just talk to him about it. Tell him to cool it with the texting, but reassure him that you love him back so he doesn't feel bad. If he really loves you, I think he'd appreciate you telling him that its bothering you so he can stop.
 
illriginal
post Mar 28 2008, 04:51 PM
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QUOTE(DeviantShadows @ Mar 27 2008, 08:09 PM) *
Wow, feeling smothered with only 10 texts? blink.gif I get about 30-50 from my boyfriend daily. But I like it, hahah. Yay for unlimited texting.

Same here... literally every night before I go to bed I have to delete all my messages because it'll be full =\
 
tokyo-rose
post Mar 28 2008, 05:11 PM
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QUOTE(Tamacracker @ Mar 27 2008, 05:19 PM) *
Right but she never made any mention about how he's worried that she's cheatin... so what are you talkin about?... Or is that just an assumption you made? rolleyes.gif

I was just giving an example of how some girls feel smothered and controlled by their boyfriends if they're being checked up on for that reason.
 
Glamourouz
post Mar 29 2008, 01:24 AM
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QUOTE(DeviantShadows @ Mar 27 2008, 08:09 PM) *
Wow, feeling smothered with only 10 texts? blink.gif I get about 30-50 from my boyfriend daily. But I like it, hahah. Yay for unlimited texting.

Just talk to him about it. Tell him to cool it with the texting, but reassure him that you love him back so he doesn't feel bad. If he really loves you, I think he'd appreciate you telling him that its bothering you so he can stop.


I completely agree...I loved the text messages my boyfriend sent me; I miss the 5,000 minutes a month he & I used on each other (we had the same subscriber) but his phone's off until he finishes deployment & comes back to the states in May, now I get a lot of emails...some people like communication with their s/o...if it's overwhelming just tell him how you feel
 

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