Co-sign.

Oh, that reminds me...

I was dating a girl in the Navy for a really short period of time. She deployed a lot, so it wasn't even worth trying to harvest a relationship when we hardly knew each other. I had a field op and some other miscellaneous bullshit, that I was voluntold for, out in the jungle. On the way back, I sent her an email and told her what time I was going to be in the barracks.

Once I got back to base, I checked my rifle back in, then dragged my stankin' ass up the stairs. Somehow, half sleep, exhausted, and soaked from random tropical showers, I managed to make it to my room without falling over. I immediately stripped down and took a shower. Once I washed the soap off of my face, I turn around she was sneaking into the shower with me.

To keep this PG-13, doggystyle in the shower, she rode me on my chair, then we were between the sheets. I haven't slept that well since.

^^
Damn.

And Trish, thats hot. Hehe.

Somebody is definitely turning it up.


I am definitely going to try that one.

Trish + Cathholic Schoolgirl Uniform + Me = Pleasurable Entertainment.

I almost banged this girl in a e-one rescue truck.

Worrrrrd?

Do you even know what that is?! lol.

almost??

I'm guessing its a fire truck, or some sort of EMS vehicle, but those details aren't even that important. The simple fact that someone got down in one of those vehicles is interesting. haha

Wait... almost?

First this is the actual engine where it almost went down:





The infamous rescue one

Secondly, yes almost.







Yeah. I figured that since I was not a firefighter, I didn't want to jinx my chances of getting in.

Ahh, gotcha.

Anyone ever had sex on camera?

I edited my post, so you guys could see rescue one in all of her glory.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v258/tungtwista/Javonn.gif

I don't think thats entirely appropriate, tung. So I linked it.

LMAO.

The Little Mermaid one was slightly more funny.

I don't get it lmao. I swear sometimes I am really dumb.

July 2006.

After 13 weeks of being surrounded by males, and only seeing a naked woman if you get some pictures from a girl back home, you wonder if you suffer from erectile dysfunction. I'm serious, I was a little worried after not being aroused for that long. Once I touched down in Texas, I put on my uniform so my mother can parade me around to her friends and family members. At the time, I was Private nothing, no ribbons, no accomplishments, no experiences. Just a boot devil sperm, fresh out of training.

My mother is really into scrapbooking. Her and her scrapbooking friends, sit around, watch The View, or Lifetime, gossipping about shit that women normally gossip about. There was a younger one of the group. I'm guessing she was in her late 20's or early 30's, who had no problems expressing her attraction to men in uniform. I'm still a little desensitized to human contact so I really didn't know how to respond.

After an afternoon of me trying to play the catch up game on MySpace, and organizing some get together for that night, my mother told me she had to drive across town to give one of her friends a ride home. It would take her a couple hours (there and back). Little did I know, her friend that was eyeing me (Jackie), had stayed back to finish up what she was doing.

No one else was home, so I'm walkling around shirtless, 40 in hand, listening to my music at high volumes, and enjoying my freedom. She looked at me and said, "Glad to be back?"
"You have no idea."
"So will you go to war."
"More than likely."
"You must be so scared."
"Not really. Oh, I'm sure you know my name already, but I'll introduce myself. I'm Brandon."
"Jackie, nice to meet you handsome."

That was the first sign.

Somehow, we got into the conversation of her 'ex-husband,' and her lost custody battle and, looking back on it, she used it as a crutch. Good move on her part because, then, Pvt. Saunders was completely oblivious to what was going down.

"Y'know, I haven't seen the upstairs of your house, yet. Your mother mentioned something about a new TV?"
"Yea, we have a wall-mounted plasma. The first new piece of technology my parents have purchased in years."

More small talk ensued as we headed upstairs. I showed her around, all MTV Cribs style, and what not, and she wanders into my room, sits on my bed and made herself comfortable.

Sign #2.

A single, attractive, female, flirting with me, and sitting on my bed? Shiiiiit. It was almost too obvious; too easy, "maybe I should put on a shirt, I apologize for being rude."
"No, I'd rather you keep it off."

Sign #3.

We're keeping this PG-13, though. Remember Jason Richardson's memorable Slam Dunk Competition? Yea, it was like that. I put it down.

Yo I was just giggling like a little bitch at this story. Did you finish it off with that sick reverse dunk like he did?

You should write a book.

I choked on my sunny Delight reading that

No, just a cumshot.



You'd like that, wouldn't you?

HOE.




But yes.

Best post so far.

That post put Augusten Burroughs to shame.