When girls get together and talk about their dream guy, it's the NICE GUY. This NICE GUY is sensitive, caring, compassionate, always there for you, and respects you.

Real life is something completely different isn't it? When you ask women about men, they say: "Men are SLIME!" "Men are SHIT!" "Men are WORTHLESS!" Yet, at the end of the day, who do they go home with and have sex with? The SLIME, the SHIT, and the WORTHLESS.

You get a call from your girl friend. She goes, "Oh, he always ignores me, I wish he'd treat me better. _____, you're such a nice guy. You'll be so lucky when you get a girlfriend. But, you know, it can't be me, because I'm in love with a shit."

Right, so, women love shits. I can be a shit, can't I? Someone help me out, some pointers, what's a great way to mistreat a woman short of beating her?

Nice guys do come last. Pun intended. Actually, nice guys don't come at all. Guess girlfriend shouldn't come first after all, that might make her like me more.

So what do I do? Say I get a girl's number. I call her, go on a date. Then what, just not call her at all? When does the a-hole come out? Immediately? After a date or two? Help pls.