Ok, This is not spam to start out with..

Ok me and my boyfriend have been going out 10 months on August 6. (Holy shit 10 months..) Tonight we got to talking and we both brought up sex.. STAY WITH ME.. ok, me... I kinda wanna get married but..thats a sorta.. I DO NOT WANT KIDS.. Him, He dosent wanna get married and he dosen't want kids eather.. ANYWAY.. I start talking to him how I wanna wait to have sex till im married.. <-- Lie.. -_- I wanted to see what he would do. He got really frushtrated and got pissed and he said.. " YOU KNOW THAT I DONT WANNA GET MARRIED!" Right there and then he was about to dump me right on the spot. Then I told him that I wanted to see what he would do if I do so.. H was like.. " Did it help any? "

Right now I really dont know.. it kind of bothers me how he would dump me just like that.. I that to me would have felt liek a big waste of time. I really to love him and care about him alot.. He understands that I wont have sex right now with him because I am going in to the 10th grade..

I JUST AM SO CONFUSED

Advice..

Please help

right. you're in the 10th grade. i'd think that's a little young...i wouldn't be thinking about that at the moment. so he's angry and threatens to break up with you just because you won't sex with him? that's not much of a boyfriend if he'll break up with you just because of that.

He would do the some thing. -_-
I know understand that but it is the only way that I could get the real truth out of him.
NOT SAYING HE WOULD LIE! But you just never know.

I used to talk with my ex about sex too. We talked about it openly so we knew what was gonna come some day. It never came. I think you guys should talk. Ask him if he broke up with you cause of what you said or somthing else.

The best thing to do in a relationship is to talk and say what you feel.

No... He will wait. He just dosent want to get married.. I said that I was going to " wait " till that time. Which wont happen because.. im not going to get married.. So he is thinking to hims self.. " WHY AM I WASTING MY TIME WITH HER? " I think..



We didn't brake up.. We do talk openly about everything. He also said before he left.. " You know I woulden't come around here if I didn't love you.." " So its not just the stuff we do with eachother the reason I keep coming around." So right there he just told me he is not using me and he is waiting till im " Ready "

I have no clue what your going to do...

Thanks for the help...

look

If anyone in a relationship ever tries to change your opinions on something that you strongly believe in or tries to just change you so your the person they want you to be. IT WILL NEVER WORK.
because their wanting you to be something your not and its will be doomed in the end.


Look if you don't want to have sex til your married and he doesn't want to get married then its not going to work out.
Unless he changes his mind about getting married.

He should accept the fact that you don't want to have sex until your married and drop it. If hes going to fight over something as simple as that then its not worth it.


hmm i may come back and add more
my mind is kind of blank

I don't see why you're confused. You lied to him and disrespected him. He told you that he doesn't want to get married then you go ahead and lie about the "I don't want to have sex until I'm married" thing.

That was nice..

I dont wanna get married..



Im confused because he was going to drop me like droping change on the floor..
Thats what really confuses me.. I thought he loved me more then that..

BUT.. we are still young.



Im confused because he was going to drop me like droping change on the floor..
Thats what really confuses me.. I thought he loved me more then that..

BUT.. we are still young.
well I am.. im 15 my b day is dec 20th and he is 17 his birthday is sep 20th

Pshhh
so

Even if you lied to him
if your not comfortable enough to have sex with him then tell him the truth don't monkey around it and fill his head with lies
Thats rude!


haha.

Ugg, I was still editing. I'm so slow.

Just because he doesn't want to get married doesn't mean that he doesn't want a commitment or that he wants to pursue a player lifestyle or some other thing. Maybe he thinks that marriage is just played out or maybe he wants him and his future wife to be together because they genuinely want to, not because they're bound by a marriage license.

Yeah, love is powerful but lies and deception weaken it. I don't think that he thought it was very nice to have his honesty used against him as a test. I might have dumped you on the spot too.

^agree
i was going to also put in

Have you ever asked him why he doesn't want to get married? A lot of guys think it ties them down in life and they don't have any freedom to do the things they want to do.

But lying is rude and shows a weakness I think. Its like trusting someone so much and then breaking it in a matter of seconds.

Yeah.. I kinda relized that.. -_-

Now what do I do.. :-(





I will have sex with him.. just not yet..

Just call him and talk to him about it.
Tell him you've been thinking over it some, and then insert the truth.


lol
when you have sex with him
be safe kiddies.

You know I will... better to be safe then sorry.

He should respect your thoughts..he can`t just force you into having sex or he`ll break up with you..

OMG...tenth grade?! WAYYYYYY too young. If your boyfriend would dump you just because you don't want to have premarital sex, then he's a jerk and he's worth your time. He obviously doesn't love you, and love is the only thing that makes sex worth having. But that's just me.

Plus, it was wrong to f**k with his head like that.

Yeah, what everyone else siad... you shouldn't mess with peoples head... that's wrong, he may have had a different reaction if you just told him the truth, but are you ready for sex? Ask yourself... and after you realized that he may break up if he knows you never wanted to have sex with him.... do you really want to have sex with him?


Me personally, I know i want to wait until I get married, but I seriously feel like I'm going to f**k up... >.>

You people sound like he is useing me.. We are waiting to have sex.. I know Im to young and I am only in teh 10th grade. He just asked me if i would ever have sex with him and I said.. I was waiting till marrage.. <-- the lie. He told me that he wasen't getting married. So he was thinking.. (Why am I wasting my time yo?) I know it sounds harsh but why would you?

Just to repeat what I said before. I am not getting married and im not going to have kids. Thats just me.

We are fine now we talked things out and he understands why I did that to him because.. how would you knwo the truth you know?

I wont be talking to him for a while.. because im going on v-cay next week.. Fun. Not :-(

I don't mean to be a wet blanket, but come on, you're both pretty young. Why are you even worrying about having discussions regarding sex, sex before marriage, marriage, kids, etc.? Shouldn't you be talking about video games or emo music or something? Just ease into relationships and relax a bit. Don't feel pressured by the media or your peers to worry about sex and marriage right now.

I agree/dissagree with you... I agree that you should worry to much about those things, but when you or your girlfriend want to talk about sex or are thinking about wanting to have sex. I think it deserves a discussion. Yes, you shouldn't feel pressured by the media or your peers, but be real... for a guy who is a relationship, it's only human instinct to want to have sex. If the desire is great enough then I think it is something that should be talked about.

Also, you should think about marriage when your dating. Not that you should be thinking about it ever second, but when dateing someone you should always be on the look-out for things that you would never be able to live with. What's the piont of dateing someone if it's only doomed for failure. If you arn't ever going to get married then why should you be dating/getting attached to people in the first place. There is nothing wrong with being single, but if you don't want to get married EVER then why waste the time? I personally know that I would never date a girl if she told me she never wanted to get married.... I don't know, but marriage is a major goal of mine... I guess it can wait, but some day I deffinily want to get married and have a family just like my parents did except better. If my partner didn't share that goal with me then I would feel as if I was wasting my time, and that eventually I would break-up with them anyways. I would go through all this bullshit breaking up with them for no reason.

If you never want to be married then why would you date in the first place? Why not just fool around with other poeple that don't want to get married?

^ You really think all teenagers KNOW whether they really want to get married? For instance, I don't. Sometimes I find myself hating the thought of marriage (because I'm more of a career person), but sometimes I just think this society's built for families. You don't always have to think about marriage in a relationships. Some people date for fun.

Anyway. He was ready to "dump" you right there because he thought you wouldn't have sex? Wow. Leave him, he's not worth it. He seems just like almost all other idiots. Have some dignity..

And, man, mipadi's always right.

You don't always think about marraige in a relationship XD... I'm just saying that if you find that you know that you couldn't live with that person then whats the piont of dating them if you know that you will break up with them anyways? Why go through the heart break when you could just be f**k buddies?

Personally, I don't find it fun breaking peoples hearts after I leave the relationship. I also don't think it would be very fun if the person I was dating said to me, "sorry, I was dating you for fun..."

mipadi isn't always right

I know what you're saying, but sometimes people aren't that committed to think about moving in/getting married and all that. Especially young teens. Not everyone you date will be the ONE you want to end up with forever. If you feel like they're your "soul mate", or whatever, sure - never hurts to talk about it.

Let me ask you this: has every relationship of yours been so serious that you've talked about those things?