Talk about bad timing. As you can see in the signature, I'm leaving Createblog for a while.

Well, I'm sure you all know I am engaged. What you probably don't know is that my fiance is 18 years older than me. (I'm 17 years old.) Of course, my friends have accepted it, he really is a wonderful guy and I've been dating him for about 2 years, and Geena adores him to death, it's just that my family doesn't know how old he is yet.

Most of you know that I had Geena when I was just 13, by another man - the man responsible for me leaving CB ( ) - and when I had her, my family basically disowned me. I haven't talked to them since.

BUT....

This morning, guess who calls? My parents. They heard I was getting married, blah blah.

They complained that I have been ignoring them, and why should I? I mean, they only ditched me to be on my own, carrying a baby for 9 months, with no money. [/end sarcasm]

But since they are family, and I haven't seen/talked to them in almost 5 years, I decided to let them meet my fiance. The only thing is, I'm worried what they'll think about him. I mean, as previously stated, he is a GREAT guy and I know because Geena is in love with him ( ), but my family just won't understand.

They still are criticizing, rude and ashamed about me having Gee, but of course, they're family and I admit that I miss them. Sort of.

John (my fiance) is pretty excited to meet them, even though he thinks he knows that I'm uncomfortable about it. He just thinks I'm uncomfortable because I haven't seen them in a while.

I'm really worried about how my family will talk (trust me, gossip in my family gets around, really fast), they'll think that I'm a slut or something, because my fiance and me have such a huge age difference.

I know I shouldn't care, but this is my FAMILY and I don't want them to judge.


If any mod feels this shouldn't be in the Relationship forum, please move it.

I think typically the parents will think "...18 years older?!" and be pessimistic when they judge hin. But give them time to get to know him. After a while, they'll see the positive out of this, and accept and love.

wow... maybe they could accept it over time? good luck after all they're family, and should still love you. i mean, you're their child! (talking about your parents btw lol)

wow sounds like you have a really rough life 4 years ago carying a babie for 9 months then taking care of the babie with out no money and your only 14 when you had her i give you mad props girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! wow makes me think what would i do with out my parents

well your parents are gay for leaving you and 18 years wow big difference but its ok age is just number as long as you too are at the same mature level is cool and considering you have a kid at age 13 i say you really matarued lol good luck with that !
.:tony:.

i think the reason they called is because they want to reconcilliate with you. they'll get shocked when they see him, but they will have to accept it, and they are going to talk themselves into it.

Best luck to you

wow...wow, that is really tough what you're going through. I really admire what you are doing though. The age difference thing isn't that bad, as long as you love him. I'm sure the wedding will be beautiful :) And yes i can see where you're coming from about your family...But i think that no matter what they say (good or bad) they will always love you. They'll probably be shocked at first, but i believe you when you say john is a nice guy, so I think that over time they would accept him. Don't freak out if at first they don't like him, they probably would just be shocked ya know? And just because you guys have a big age difference does NOT mean your a slut! And i don't think your family will think so. Frankly I admire what you're doing, from Geena, to ur ex, to this situation with your family and John. As I said before, I will def pray for you. Keep that beautiful smile on your face :) things are gonna work out

That sucks, Felicia At first, they'll probably be like " Whoa, 17 years older?!"...but once they talk to him, I'm sure they'll be happy with your decision

I understand that's hard, but why the admiration? I don't think there is anything to admire about sex at such a young age? As for youre parents, Age difference is going to matter to them no matter what. Nevertheless, love is beautiful in all forms, and if your really love him, age difference shouldn't matter.

hmm..
I think your parents want to talk to u again..Well you can ignore them and make things worser or try to better the relationship between u and ur parents...
Hope things get better..

aww. i am so sorry to hear that. well, if i was in you family, after hearing that he is 18 years older than you, the first feeling that would run through me would obvisouly be shock! that is a very large age gap...but love is love and age is just a number.
and sometimes you just don't have to care. if he is such a great guy and you love him (and geena) than it kinda shouldn't matter what your family says or even thinks. they don't sound that nice anyway.

your family will probably shocked at the fact that he's 18 years older at first. but don't worry, give it time and they'll get over it. they probably miss you. just as long as both of you are in love, i don't think parents should really matter. good luck to everything

when you're 70 and he's 88, there'll be little difference. o.O

Wow Felicia...I just want to give you a hug right now. That really touched me. For I want to give you mad props for raising your baby practically on your own. Now that is what I call a strong woman. That sucks that you parents disowned you over you having a child. Sure you were young but I cant imagine how I would have gotten through if I was in the same situation and my family disowned me. Now to your parents...first allow me a moment to let out some agresssion....

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How dare they!! I cant believe that did that and then have to nerve to call you (after what alomst 5 years) and act like its your fault that you have been in contact with them. I really dont think you should be the one to worry about what they think of your fiance at all. You have been through what I think is the worse with them. Getting married is a very exciting time in your life, dont allow them to bring you down. You deserve happiness and to not be judged. Maybe they have changed...I surely would hope so, but if not you need not worry because the simple sad truth is sometimes people never change so there would be no use in you dwelling on fact that they may hate your fiance, or judge you. Sorry this long but that story is so familiar to me (a know two people i went to school with, they got pregnant young, and their families disowned them as well) and it makes me soooooo angry. I really hope all goes well.....

Felicia, I'm so happy that you've found someone to love so much. Someone that is also willing to take care of your baby girl.

I know this is going to be tough for you, but have faith in the love that ou two bear for each other. Even if they do talk and behave badly toward, would you give up on him? I don't think you would, so chin up and good luck honey! I look forward to your return!

<3 Naomi

As someone mentioned, age difference is nothing when you get older. My parents have a 10 year age difference, and you can't even tell. Don't worry about that.

However, I think you might have a problem with your family. I almost guarantee you they won't approve. But you really love him, so screw them. He sounds like a great guy. If they start asking you why and bothering you about it, just yell at them for ditching you at age 13. God, thats just wrong.

I wish you the best of luck.

family is family, blood is blood.. even though they did wat they did.. dont mean they dont love you.. they were just mad.. and by calling you they showed exactlii that... they miss you... they want you back in their life along with your daughter and your upcoming husband.. no matter wat happens your still their daughter and thats all that matters... in the end... after all that you guys have been through... i think they would be able to accpet this... so dont worrie and cheer up... =) you got us praying for you.. <3

wow!!! major age difference! ehh. whatever floats your boat but, anyways i think your parents should just accept you for who you are. i dont know why after all that time they just want to pop up. why do they care that you're getting married? they dont care about their granddaughter

wow.
you are my hero.
all the power to you.

^^ what sammi said

you need to make sure they talk to him at lest a bit before finding out how old he is... first impressions mean a lot, so if they discover how wonderful he is firs, it may soften the impact at least a bit

and if they go ap... well, to be honest, i think you've proven well enough that you dont need them. you're obviously strong, and with john's love, you'll be fine

follow you're heart

yea...even if there is gossip u need to give them time to get to know them. or let them know how old he is in advanced so they wont b all surprised wen they meet him. but then again maybe they need to get to know him first. does he look younger than his age? but n e way as long as ur in love...its all good. love should conquer all.

i agree with james, let them talk to him a bit before letting them know his age...yes it is a big age difference but if you guys really love each other and he is the great guy you say, then that shouldn't matter.
good luck to you.

well. you live on your own and have your own job right? i dont think its a problem because basically you're an adult with your own money and own house: its your life. if your in love then dont let critisism stop you. i wish you the best of luck!!

I'm going to be honest when I say that I think that the first impression won't go so great...but if you work and it and try to make them understand....they will....because of his good traits and how he is around you and your daughter and around them....give it time...I'm sure it will be fine...
But even if it's not...it's your life..you make the decisions and let no one ever make you doubt that.

honestly, you are a beautiful and strong woman, don't worry about what any of them say. You have been thru hell and back, and they have no right to judge you. I admire you for wanting to bridge the gap with your family, I have a family a lot like that. I just stay far away from them. So at least you are being strong and trying. But dont let it get you down if they reject him. It doesnt matter. You matter, your baby girl matters, and he matters. Thats what is most important. Actually I lied. What is most important is that you stay strong. good luck~

wow... 18 yrs older ............ my parents would of been the same, yet i wouldnt want them to interfer or get involved after 5 years?! ... but hey, they love you.. let them in