i'm sorry |
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 Jun 17 2005, 10:45 PM
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#1
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Senior Member  Group: Member Posts: 512 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 9,682  |
Sorry Daddy,
I don't call everyday . It's just, everytime we talk, i have nothing to say . I guess it's because, we've never been that close, you've never been there for me when i needed you most . I really do try to be a good daughter, but it's hard to do so, when you're a bad father . Sorry Mommy, I'm not really the best, been holding it in, but i gotta get this off my chest . I'm tired of your scolding, all you do is yell, shout, and scream . Now i'm tired of living my life through your dreams . Stop thinking that everything i do is simply corrupt, can't you accept the fact that i just want to grow up ? Let me live my life, stop holding me down . Stop looking at everything that i do with a frown . I dont understand why you just can't leave me alone . Please accept the fact that your little girl has grown . If you're tying to change me, then you're out of luck, because who cares what you want ? i don't give a f**k . |
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Jun 17 2005, 10:57 PM
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#2
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 that heaven is overrated Group: Member Posts: 5,096 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 53,124 |
Wow, that's very emotional, but I like your style of writing. Good job.
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Jun 20 2005, 03:50 PM
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#3
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s w e e t e s t Group: Member Posts: 808 Joined: Sep 2004 Member No: 46,149 |
Wow. Im sorry to hear about your problem with your parent. But that is a very strong and emotional peice of writting that you've just wrote. Good Job.
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Jun 21 2005, 10:35 PM
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#4
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 My name's Katt. Nice to meet you! Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674 |
Wow. I think this is one of your best. This is so well written and emotional and the rhymes make perfect sense. This is definitely a favorite on here. Great job!!!
 600th post!!!!!!! |
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Jun 21 2005, 10:42 PM
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#5
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 Newbie Group: Member Posts: 5 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 157,455 |
that was very good!!
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Jul 11 2005, 06:54 PM
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#6
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 Bay Area YadadaDiiiig. Group: Official Member Posts: 4,249 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,202 |
wow. that was AMAZiNG. exactly how i feel. but mines would be more angsty and hateful.
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| *Azarel* |
Jul 11 2005, 07:00 PM
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#7
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Guest |
I like it all up until the swear. It doesn't seem to fit, imo.
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Jul 11 2005, 07:02 PM
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#8
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 sunshiine Group: Member Posts: 1,080 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,360 |
I like it its very emotional but I agree ^ the swearing is kinda un necessary I liked all the rhymes how they all fit.
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Jul 15 2005, 05:52 PM
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#9
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mood: content Group: Member Posts: 2,063 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 42,325 |
Very emotional, it had nice flow and the rhyming was very smooth. I'm sorry that you and your parents don't get along. :(
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Jul 19 2005, 05:49 PM
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#10
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 499 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 109,961 |
OMG?!?!??!..I loved the flow of that poem...I'm really feeling you..it reminds me of Pinks song..Family Portrait!!..have you ever heard it before..I LOVEE THAT SONG!!!...you'd really like it...
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Jul 20 2005, 08:26 PM
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#11
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 My desperate heart is far too weak to run for you this long. Group: Member Posts: 640 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 150,342 |
wow...how sad. although, i loved it
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Jul 20 2005, 09:19 PM
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#12
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 Yawn Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 9,530 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 65,772 |
wow...it sounds like somethan i could of taken right out of my journal. That was really good. Nice choice of words, and very emotional. I like the way it flowed, and i could relate to it . Good job! :)
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| *stephinika* |
Jul 20 2005, 09:31 PM
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#13
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beautiful. really. that is exactly how i feel basically...its so relatable and its well written too. great flow and everything.
great work
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Jul 20 2005, 09:38 PM
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#14
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 :) Group: Member Posts: 1,234 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 146,496 |
Wow, that's so deep. It goes//flows and everything. Wow, it's something I gotta read again.. it's so good. Wow, very nice job
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Jul 21 2005, 11:13 AM
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#15
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 161 Joined: Jun 2005 Member No: 153,708 |
aww that was a lovely poem, touching
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Jul 21 2005, 04:35 PM
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#16
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 Residential Crazy Child Group: Member Posts: 934 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 116,897 |
That was so awesome. That's exactly how I feel. I think this is my favorite poem from now on.
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Jul 27 2005, 03:30 PM
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#17
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 <-[RaWR]-> Group: Member Posts: 180 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 102,133 |
kick ass poem sometimes I feel like telling my parents off like that too.
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Jul 27 2005, 05:22 PM
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#18
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 What a hypocrite. Group: Member Posts: 2,754 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 128,150 |
Jeez, this is depressing.
Poem = </3. I like it. |
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Jul 30 2005, 02:20 PM
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#19
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 Senior Member Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,799 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,450 |
It made me cry.
Ah, it was real good. |
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Jul 31 2005, 12:54 PM
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#20
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 straight as a rainbow and twice as colorful Group: Member Posts: 523 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 112,415 |
this is really good. Angsty... it's filled with emotion and it flows well.
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