My Conclusive Prayer |
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| *CrackedRearView* |
 Oct 21 2004, 03:38 PM
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#1
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God,
As little vessels of replenishment, God, I thank You for the raindrops You place so effervescently on the earth. All the mildew, bile, and scourge is carefully carried off the sides of the earth by Your careful eroding hand. Though the trickle of Your magnificence has brought me ample pain and dolor, I am ever more serene, and I like it. It's days like today that admonishingly kick me in the mouth, reasserting my identity as a living mortal person. But days like these serve another sequestered purpose; they remind me of my father. I know I'm not the best Christian, and that I fall circadianly, but if You could honor my highest request, it would pull together all of the clipped strings in my life. It would be my shangri-la. I just want one thing, God. Just one thing. I wanna stand next to my father up in heaven, and help him decide where every exquisite rain drop will place itself on some kid's nose, and brighten his day. Yours, Justin |
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Oct 21 2004, 04:22 PM
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#2
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 Will write poetry for sex!  Group: Member Posts: 1,110 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 600 |
You sunuvabitch, you killed me with the last line.
I just want to give you a damn hug, dude. You honor your father so much, I'm sure he's looking down on you, proud as he ever could be. |
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| *CrackedRearView* |
Oct 24 2004, 02:12 AM
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#3
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Haha you can hug me, Joe
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Mar 18 2005, 12:26 PM
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#4
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,634 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 27,631 |
i usually don't lik reading things about God becuase i can't relate, but i like the piece :)
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Mar 18 2005, 07:12 PM
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#5
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 crushed. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 9,432 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,026 |
how incredibly sweet and lovely..honestly, I don't believe in god, but the whole piece really touched me.
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Apr 11 2005, 02:15 AM
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#6
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 hello : ) Group: Official Member Posts: 4,227 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 13,139 |
QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 21 2004, 3:22 PM) You sunuvabitch, you killed me with the last line. I just want to give you a damn hug, dude. You honor your father so much, I'm sure he's looking down on you, proud as he ever could be.  I agree. I really like the last lines too. Good job! |
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Apr 11 2005, 09:28 PM
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#7
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Brie Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 10,172 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,548 |
QUOTE(MasteRxKiD @ Oct 21 2004, 5:22 PM) You sunuvabitch, you killed me with the last line. I just want to give you a damn hug, dude. You honor your father so much, I'm sure he's looking down on you, proud as he ever could be. Agreed. Very, very well-written. I love this. You're a very good writer, Justin. Wonderful job. 
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