What is it and what's your stance on it? If a woman hits a man, does he have the right to hit her back? If you get in an argument and it starts getting physical, at what point is it domestic violence? What's the line between child abuse and punishment?

I happened to read a comment on an article from MTV about the whole Rihanna & Chris Brown thing that sort of pissed me off. It's actually kind of funny, but...


http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1605533/2...0/rihanna.jhtml

lol, wtf man.

Anyways, I personally think deliberately hurting someone who's physically weaker than you and unable to defend him/herself is wrong.

Wow. I mean, in some ways I respect that he at least replied honestly. Although, you need a wheel barrel to lift the size of his balls.

That being said, I disagree that violence, particularly that of the domestic variety is "deserved." If this was something done in self defense, than it's self defense and not physical abuse.

I have no idea what Spears has to do with any of this.

I've never been one to advocate the "B-but...she started it first!" excuse. It doesn't matter who started it, if you were a real man, you would know not to hit a woman back just because she hit you. I don't care if two guys want to fight it out if they have the same physical build. Not that I advocate violence either, but it wouldn't bother me this much. But in this case, Rihanna was obviously the weaker of the two, and yes, IT WAS a completely douche-y, beastly thing to do.

Either way, if someone is being a bitch to you, and you retaliate back with violence that she can't defend herself from...that's just wrong. At the very least you could walk away from the situation so you wouldn't have to suffer her "bitchiness". But she can't walk away from a guy who wants to hurt her.

Words might hurt, but f*ck that. Sticks and stones can KILL you. Verbal abuse =/= physical abuse.

At what point is it domestic violence? I'd have to say the moment either party inflicts violence on the other person with full intent to hurt them. There is no way Chris Brown can say that he didn't mean to beat Rihanna up that badly, and he didn't mean to hurt her. In the moment, he meant to hurt her and so that counts as domestic violence.

Child abuse, on the other hand...I think of that more like conditioning. A spanking on the butt here and there isn't going to hurt the child, it's just going to teach them (effectively) that whatever they were doing was wrong, so here's a spank to reaffirm that for you. Of course there's a fine line, but if the parent was in their right mind they would know not to cross it. It's not the same as domestic violence because nobody should be treating their spouse/gf/bf as their child.

well that's a disturbing comment to read. wtf at all the racism? i wasn't aware beating women was a part of black culture.

i don't think there is any excuse really for abuse, especially to that level. if he had hit her ONCE, i could understand. not saying it's right, but i am saying there is a huge huge difference to me from hitting someone once in anger and hitting them multiple times. i mean i wouldn't go and punch my girlfriend in the face or something, but i'm also not gonna say she abused me if she hits me one time.

the only thing that annoys me is how some women think it's ok to hit a guy but it's not ok for a guy to hit her back. it's not ok for EITHER of them to hit each other. that's an annoying double standard to me. don't run around talking about how women are strong and all this bullshit, hit your dude, and turn around and try to play the weak female card.


child abuse, if you're leaving a mark on them then that's going too far to me. i'm ok with spanking kids though as long as it's ONLY the parents doing it and no one is going over board.

getting physical during an arguent is not necessary at all for men or a women. it doesn't solve anything. i say just walk away. i can understand if a guy hits a girl back because he's truely fearing for his life. but after just one hit? come on, that would seem like the guy just wanted to release some stress while making the woman feel small and weak.
as i've said before, i'm fine with spanking kids. if they've been made aware of the consequences before hand and have had a verbal warning. i don't like spanking kids before they're around 2 years old. they just don't seem to fully understand the reasons behind it. that could be borderline abuse to me. if the parent, or whoever is spanking the child, is spanking the child to hurt him/her and doing it out of anger, that's abuse.
did you see the picture of Rihanna's face (if that was her) all swolen and bruised? unless she was goin' off on him like a crazy woman, that wasn't self defense. it may have started off as self defense but at some point he crossed the line.
i don't even wanna ask what pc means 'cause i know it'll piss me off. but that whole thing about abuse being a part of black culture is bull. whoever wrote that is wrong in so many ways.

I personally think that whoever gets hit first has the right to hit the person back regardless of gender. The whole "women are weaker than men and should not be hit idea" is a load of rubbish. What happened to "equality"? Or does that just not touch base in this playing field? If a woman hits a man first, depending on the situation (if she was attacking him, like trying to seriously hurt him), he should restrain her and refrain from hitting her, but do so if he must. It's complicated to elaborate on, especially when you try to convince people they should be able to, because everyone "knows" that a man can't hit a woman.

Switching to the easier topic, I think there's a fine line between punishing your child and abusing him/her. Pain or injury is not a form of punishment. There are more effective and less violent ways to teach your child a lesson than to hit or hurt them. Would you do such to a teenager? No, you sit down and have a discussion. You can do the same thing with a child ages 5 and up since they start to exhibit naughty behavior at this age. I'd know such since I attend a vocational high school and Early Childhood Education and Teaching is my profession. When a child misbehaves, we sit them down and have a chat with them - ask them if they know what they did wrong. If they don't we tell them and explain to them why that behavior was unacceptable. The only physical contact that comes to play is restraining the child if he/she is not paying attention and is trying to leave. That, or when we need to take a child away from an area to sit them down and they aren't cooperating - we'll have to either pick them up or take them by the hand. It goes no further than that.

I've read books on this subject and I understand that some parents get frustrated incredibly easy, and means other than violence don't get rid of that frustration - they want something real and living to hurt, something that won't fight back - an incredibly upsetting and horrible thing to do (same goes for animal abuse), but people like that need dire help.

Like I said, there's a fine line between punishment and child abuse. It's a sad day in the Earth when people can't tell when they've gone too far. I mean, read the book "A Child Called It" for several examples.

I do agree with this somewhat. I think that a lot of it has to do with the intent and reason behind why you hit someone. If you're upset and you use someone as a punching bag to take out your frustrations on, that's wrong. If you get pissed that your spouse is hitting you and hit them back in retaliation and spite, it might seem justified, but I think it's still wrong. However, if you get hit first and strike the other person as a way to inhibit them from hitting you again, I don't think there's anything wrong with that.



I agree with this. I'm a neuro major and in my social and personality development class, we went through a study where it's shown that kids feel more inclined to obey their parents when their parents show their disapproval through disappointment and words rather than through physical spanking and such. I told my mom this and she laughed at me.

^ LOL yeah my mom would do that too.


Well if you want to talk about equality...

Generally, males are stronger than females, and generally, females would be the weaker ones and therefore should not be hit back in return. If we're talking about equality here, then it only makes sense that the weaker sex should be given extra protection. If you say that the weaker party can fight it out with the stronger party just for the sake of equality, then there's a serious imbalance of said equality in that instance.

Of course there are exceptions, and we must look at them at an individual basis. Say Rihanna really did hit Chris Brown to the extent that he felt like he was in personal danger at first. And so he fights back. But at the end of the day, Rihanna's the one with the f*cked-up face and CB was the one who posted his bail and got away with little to no physical damage. In this case of inequity, it's fair to say that Rihanna should NOT have been hit back in return.

Equality is often misunderstood; overrated, even. That's not to say that people shouldn't have the same human rights, but everyone is different (especially males and females) and consideration must be taken. It's more important to me to judge everybody fairly and objectively, based on their personal differences rather than impose the same expected behaviours for everybody - you simply can't do that, because we're all different. i.e. You can't say that A can hit B if B hit A first. You haven't taken anything else into account at all.

Biology happened to it. On average, men produce ten times more serum testosterone than females.

^ Reidar puts it best lol. Men and women are not the same and it's absurd to dream of a day where the two could actually be treated exactly the same.

Equality is simple to define and may be the easy way out, but equity is what is needed.

I agree completely with that.



That's indeed true. We read about that study, most likely the same one.



So biologically and physically, men are stronger than women. Right-o, but biology aside, women fought for equal rights all those years ago, and if they want to be treated as equal, I don't think they should be treated like they're the weaker sex. But I might just be running around a whole different playing field here, so please excuse me if I seem out of place, . I mean, aren't there women out there who are stronger than some men? I mean, check out Sydney Bristow in that television show Alias - she kicks the many butts of men hundreds of times (literally). There are women who are strong like that. But the fact of the matter is, mostly everyone looks at the biological side of this area, so there really isn't a point in me defending the other side. So, men may be physically stronger than women, but I can damn sure say that a lot of women are mentally and emotionally stronger than men.

This is how i think of it:

if a female is hitting a man it depends on the female's size.
i once witnessed a female being twice the size of the male nd she literally kicked his face in nd he did nothing but lay on the ground...

if the female is smaller, then the male should restrain her the best he could.

in reality if a male hits a girl everyone is against it and if a male lets a girl hit him then he is a punk, puss, blahblahblah, etc, etc, etc...

That's a great point and I agree completely. Well said, !

Equal rights was never about making physiology moot. This reminds me of aspiring dissidents taking "All men were created equal" and running with "BUT REIDAR I WAS BORN WITH NO LEGS LOL."

"Equality" is simply application of law and social reform, not literally treating people as mass-produced automatons.



...I hope the Alias part was you being facetious.

Anyways, the strongest female bench presser in the world hit 531 lbs. The strongest male bench presser put up 1,015 lbs.

basically its always gonna be a double standard no matter what.

its ethnically wrong for a boy to hit a girl but its okay if a grl hits a boy

just like if a boy messes w/ mad chicks then he gets kudos but if it was a grl, then she's a slut

Of course I was, .



Too true.

It all stems from gender roles. Sucks, but its true. I don't agree with them but societal expectations makes them inevitable.