Problems with my girlfriend ! HELP |
Problems with my girlfriend ! HELP |
Dec 11 2009, 07:49 AM
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#1
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 1 Joined: Dec 2009 Member No: 754,965 |
Okay here is the background to my relationship. Me and my GF have been going out for the past eight months. we started talking as friends and then one thing led to another and we got into a relationship! well here is the thing i never asked her out! don't get me wrong i wanted to ask her out but after we had slept together she assumed we were going out ! and the way i found out we were going out was the fact that later after we had slept together, i told her hey i wanna take this to the next level and she said wut do u mean i said u know actually going out and she fliped! lol saying oh we r! " i don't sleep With people i don't go out with. Anyways from the get go i was close with her and pretty much told her everything i was stright forward but she never got close to me. meaning she never asked for my help or never said any kind of stories about herslef. she kind of had a wall up. oh let me add this we live 80 miles away from each other.she didn't introduce me to her group of friends until like 3 months ago and she even told that me that usually she doesn't get her bfs involved with her friends. and i was one of the few that got involved
anyways here are my problems i feel like she is not into me. the reason being she is never there for me if i have a problem like she doesn't show interest in talking to me or trying to help me with anything. it's bothering me the fact that i can't get too close to her like i'm not use to not getting attention from my gf's and my relationship is kinda seriouse or at least she makes me feel that way. by seriouse i mean we have been talking about marriage. sorry for writing so much! |
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Dec 11 2009, 07:35 PM
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#2
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Member Group: Member Posts: 12 Joined: Dec 2009 Member No: 754,801 |
First of all, don't force your way into her circle of friends. In my personal opinion, I actually think it's better not to be (too) involved with her friends. That way you can have fun with your own group of friends, and her as well.
Second of all, you can't force someone to open up to you. They will when they feel ready and trust you. I'm not saying she doesn't trust you at all, perhaps she doesn't trust you enough to tell you her secrets, or perhaps she had prior trust issues so it's hard for her to open up. Third, if you feel like she isn't there for you, you need to talk to her about it. In a respectful way, however. Communication is one of the most vital aspect of a relationship, and so is being there for each other. |
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Dec 11 2009, 07:53 PM
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#3
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I'm Jc Group: Mentor Posts: 13,619 Joined: Jul 2006 Member No: 437,556 |
why would you talk about something as serious as marriage with someone who you feel has a wall up, isn't close to you, doesn't help you get through anything, and doesn't seem like she's into you?
what should you do? you should go tell her that you don't feel like she's opening up enough or there for you. if you don't wanna do that then you might as well break it off. what's there to be confused about? if you have to sign up to a design forum and ask for advice from strangers about your relationship, you shouldn't consider marriage at all cause your relationship isn't right. |
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Dec 11 2009, 09:19 PM
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#4
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 1,938 Joined: Jul 2008 Member No: 667,832 |
Communication is everything in a relationship
Tell her your feelings without pressuring her, or making her feel uncmfortable (like marriage) If you're still unsatisfied then it's prolly time to break it off. |
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Dec 12 2009, 12:51 PM
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#5
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Senior Member Group: Human Posts: 525 Joined: Nov 2008 Member No: 695,913 |
ya marriage is cool an all because i talked to my girl of 7 years about it. . . but she was also my best friend... and we are also not together or even talking right now . . . so if only you are the one being open with her but shes being reserved with you i dont think marriage is the issue right now..
Ask her whats good, explain how you feel about being open and her being there for you and see what happens.. if she is able to do it great if not then you might wanna reconsider . . *Edit * yay 300 posts ! lol Stay Up -1- Subliminal |
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Dec 12 2009, 01:21 PM
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#6
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Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,019 Joined: May 2008 Member No: 653,768 |
Penis Monger
8====D Subliminal |
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Dec 12 2009, 01:48 PM
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#7
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Senior Member Group: Human Posts: 525 Joined: Nov 2008 Member No: 695,913 |
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Dec 12 2009, 02:37 PM
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#8
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Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,019 Joined: May 2008 Member No: 653,768 |
Can You Like
-Not Do- This Gay Sig? |
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Dec 12 2009, 04:55 PM
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#9
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 1,938 Joined: Jul 2008 Member No: 667,832 |
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Dec 12 2009, 05:35 PM
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#10
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 890 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 285,645 |
You're starting to seem like the clingy one in this relationship.
If she's not willing to open up, then, as some people said, don't force her into doing anything, or pressure her. Play it cool, find yourself something to keep your mind from lapsing into a helpless one-sided love. Pay VERY close attention to her. There are very subtle things that she will reveal to you as your relationship progresses, but don't ever assume anything too quickly or you might end up scaring her. |
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Dec 12 2009, 10:47 PM
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#11
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rawr? Group: Official Member Posts: 2,705 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 285,858 |
You're starting to seem like the clingy one in this relationship. If she's not willing to open up, then, as some people said, don't force her into doing anything, or pressure her. Play it cool, find yourself something to keep your mind from lapsing into a helpless one-sided love. Pay VERY close attention to her. There are very subtle things that she will reveal to you as your relationship progresses, but don't ever assume anything too quickly or you might end up scaring her. whut he said bro' |
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Dec 13 2009, 12:31 AM
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#12
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 1,938 Joined: Jul 2008 Member No: 667,832 |
So Alexash,
Most of us have put down our opinions Your say in this? (since we havent really heard any feedback from ya) |
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Dec 14 2009, 09:31 PM
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#13
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 56 Joined: Nov 2009 Member No: 753,213 |
all i can say is being single is best because at least you feel free and dont have to deal with a girl calling you every hour saying where are you? why have you not called me? Its 1:00am Where have you been?
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