Do you misuse the word 'gay'?, What do you think about people that do? Options

[flc]

But don't you think that comes off offensive towards someone who identifies as being gay?

It shouldn't. Because that's what they are, gay. Even the most educated people use gay for identifying homosexuals. It's not an offensive word. I know my gay friends wouldn't care if I called them gay, but they would if I called them fags.

And what about people who sometimes use gay for happy? Should homosexuals get mad at that?

Are you saying that if I said, "I hate black," like the color black, around a black person, they would be offended?

[hi-C]

^ Well, yeah, I know that, but you're equating gay with stupid. You don't think that's offensive?

[flc]

^ Well, yeah, I know that, but you're equating gay with stupid. You don't think that's offensive?

I'm not calling gay people stupid. What I meant that, seperate from homosexual, in today's society gay has taken on a different meaning, like how it meant happy back then. I am in no way linking homosexuality with stupidity, and people shouldn't see it that way either.

People are getting WAY too sensitive these days..

[aicilah999]

I HATE IT WHEN PPL MISUSE IT...annoys me...
haha. even tho i misuse it sometimes. not much tho. but i hate ppl that use 'gay' like in every convo they have and stuff.

[SKDMNLE]

Well, yeah, I use it with certian people. I say it with the people I know can take it with out being offended. Like some of my friends, I joke around with them, and sometimes I call some of my homosexual friends fags. This was of course, after they said it was okay. He calls himself a fag, in that matter.

[*I Shot JFK*]

I'm not calling gay people stupid. What I meant that, seperate from homosexual, in today's society gay has taken on a different meaning, like how it meant happy back then. I am in no way linking homosexuality with stupidity, and people shouldn't see it that way either.

People are getting WAY too sensitive these days..

so, if someone is offended by what you say, it is entirely teir fault for being to sensitive, and you have no responsiblity to adapt to their offense?

[nopattern]

lots of people get mad over this but i don't care. i don't hate gays, my best friend is, but it's just one of those things. most gays don't care. it's like calling a white person a cracker or something like that.

and the ones who get offended over it are the majority of the time, not gay.

[flc]

so, if someone is offended by what you say, it is entirely teir fault for being to sensitive, and you have no responsiblity to adapt to their offense?

Yeah. That's pretty much it. I might sound like an a-hole, but they have to get over it. It's not like I use the word gay after every word I say. THAT would get annoying. I only use it when something really bothers me, which isn't that often.

But most likely, this person who is getting offended isn't my friend and someone I would never have to see or talk to again. Because if I know my friends well, they wouldn't get so angry over a stupid word. If it was someone I truly cared about, and they gave me a REALLY good explanation for why it bothered them, then I would of course stop using it around them.

Because like mo rox said, most gays don't care. Then it IS that person's fault for being too sensitive. Because other gays could just say, "Hey, it isn't that big of a deal."

[so_jentran]

i'll have to admit, i do misuse it..and most of the time it doesn't make sense lol

[Rachel]

I definently remember that thread James, we should merge the two or something.


Anyway, I try my hardest not to use gay out of context. I do get frustrated sometimes and it comes out and then I slap myself and take it back. I usually reply to people in this fashion:
"Omg, that test was SOOO gay!"
Me-"Really, the test likes to have sex with other male tests?!"

[flc]

"Omg, that test was SOOO gay!"
Me-"Really, the test likes to have sex with other male tests?!"

Or you could have said, "Really, that test was so joyful?"

You don't ONLY have to identify gay with homosexual. And that's what I think people are doing nowadays. Using gay as stupid, like how gay was happy before.

[crazeegirl411]

wel surely it isnt desireable to use a word that can so easily be interpretted in a way that causes offense

Then why do people use words like f*ck and and b*tch. Why don't you guys feel offended for female dogs because we call other people b*tches? By being so sensitive for gay people, you are seperating them from us even more. They're the same people, but it seems like gay people have to be more offended by such things, when they're not even talking about them.

As someone said and I have said, there are multiple meanings. Society now gave it perhaps its third meaning, stupidity. Would you think someone back in the day that said, "I am gay," misused the word and offended gay people?

Even if you don't mean it, they can still take it that way. People need to think about what they say, before they say it. I really don't care if everybody around you doesn't mind, it really bothers me. I'm bisexual, and I don't think I need to hear, "THAT'S SO GAY!" every single day I'm at school or in public. It's just like walking up to somebody and saying, "Hey, nigger! Oh sorry, I just meant HEY, BUDDY!"

Thank you for all the supporters!

Um...but it's different. "Hey, nigger," is a greeting. "That's so GAY" is describing something. If you're going to compare, it's like, "Hey gay girl/guy!" And seriously how many people actually greet you like that?

Don't get me wrong. I don't use that word like "that's gay" or "you're so gay." I don't mind when others do. It's just slang. Now if people said that at the office or my boss said that to me, I would view them differently..because it's slang. But it's just normal talking with friends, I know they don't mean it like homosexual. It's just not in my vocabulary though. I still just call people stupid.

...And somehow, calling them stupid is not worse than calling them gay? Have you ever thought of when "stupid" actually offended people? Until people understood that it is not actually a big deal, and that people don't actually MEAN that you are stupid?

[NgocQuyen]

hmm well, i used to a lot. but that was a while ago and i was pretty retarded. i don't really use "gay" anymore. i say "homosexual" ex. "this homework is so homosexual" my friends know what i mean. and if you're going to judge me by just what i say, then so be it.

[Paradox of Life]

I HATE IT WHEN PPL MISUSE IT...annoys me...

even tho i misuse it sometimes.

You hate it when people misuse it even though you do it too? Hypocrite, much? Using 'gay' as a derogatory term is offensive and ignorant, period. Whether you "sometimes" do it or always do it.

I dislike when people describe things that are 'stupid' or 'unreasonable' as 'gay'. I find it rude and ignorant. I have never heard an intelligent person call something or someone gay as a derogatory term. Before you use the word gay, think of the dozens of other words you could use to sound at least remotely intelligent.

[*I Shot JFK*]

Yeah. That's pretty much it. I might sound like an a-hole, but they have to get over it. It's not like I use the word gay after every word I say. THAT would get annoying. I only use it when something really bothers me, which isn't that often.

But most likely, this person who is getting offended isn't my friend and someone I would never have to see or talk to again. Because if I know my friends well, they wouldn't get so angry over a stupid word. If it was someone I truly cared about, and they gave me a REALLY good explanation for why it bothered them, then I would of course stop using it around them.

Because like mo rox said, most gays don't care. Then it IS that person's fault for being too sensitive. Because other gays could just say, "Hey, it isn't that big of a deal."

you're a charmer, arent you?

so, one person's opinion is invalid because it is more sensitive than the majority? why wait to find someone it truly offends? why not use a term which doesnt make you sound ignorant?

Then why do people use words like f*ck and and b*tch. Why don't you guys feel offended for female dogs because we call other people b*tches? By being so sensitive for gay people, you are seperating them from us even more. They're the same people, but it seems like gay people have to be more offended by such things, when they're not even talking about them.

the point about bitch was just stupid. as if you cant tell the distinction. as far as f**k goes, i take your point, but my feelings regarding 'gay' isn't so much because the word is offensive in itself, but because it is specifically derogatory towards one group of people. surely, it is better to seperate a group by being sensitive towards them than by using their label in a derogatory way?

As someone said and I have said, there are multiple meanings. Society now gave it perhaps its third meaning, stupidity. Would you think someone back in the day that said, "I am gay," misused the word and offended gay people?

no, because the use of gay to mean happy predates the use of it to mean homosexual. to expect a cease in the use of it to mean happy would be unreasonable. but it is not unreasonable to expect people to be more sensitive now that it DOES have conotations with a sector of society, i do no find it acceptable for the 'third meaning' to evolve.

Um...but it's different. "Hey, nigger," is a greeting. "That's so GAY" is describing something. If you're going to compare, it's like, "Hey gay girl/guy!" And seriously how many people actually greet you like that?

could you REALLY not see the paralell that she was trying to draw? you've missed her point utterly by that response.

...And somehow, calling them stupid is not worse than calling them gay? Have you ever thought of when "stupid" actually offended people? Until people understood that it is not actually a big deal, and that people don't actually MEAN that you are stupid?

well obviously the word stupid will cause offense to th eperson it is directed towards. but there is not a clear third party who could ALSO take offense, and that makes the difference.

*******

a question for those who find the term to be acceptable: what are your feelings towards people who use 'fag' as an insult? they may or may not mean it to mean 'homosexual', but it still cast a negative light upon people who are actually gay, by implying that their lifestyle is something to be ashamed of, and to direct at people you wish to offend

[juliar]

i stopped saying it out loud and usually i dont online. and if i mean gay offensively, i just say "ghey" especially in games because then people know i'm not referring to gay people.

i dont really mind people saying things are gay though (my gay friend says it).

[Paul M. is baaac...]

I do use it un-approprately, to mock of ridocule somebody.

[flc]

you're a charmer, arent you?

so, one person's opinion is invalid because it is more sensitive than the majority? why wait to find someone it truly offends? why not use a term which doesnt make you sound ignorant?

Look, kiddo.

No, I'm not saying they're invalid. I shouldn't have put it in those words. What I am saying, though, is that, when EVERYONE around you is fine with it, and ignoring it, and you're making a huge fuss, don't you think that kind of makes you seem a little mad?

Example: I could, personally, find your username offensive. I could say you're treating Kennedy's assasination as a joke. Just because I alone could find it offensive, are you going to change your username to please one person? Probably not. But I wouldn't keep bugging the hell out of you to change it. I would accept it and move on with my life, like that person should who got offended. They need to realize that a lot of things in life are offensive and they can't get their way with everything everytime. {Even though when I say that something is gay I'm not meaning to calling gay people stupid, like I've said 33586974 times.}

I'm not going to keep talking about this with you. I posted that I use the word innapropriately, as well as many others. Why the hell are you getting on my back? I gave my reasons for why I use the word. No matter how much you disagree, they're my reasons.

As far as I know, I haven't offended anyone who's heard me use it, which isn't often. When someone comes up to me and tells me it really bothers them, I will gladly stop. What I think is that you guys are blowing this out of proportion. I don't think that this is even an issue, but maybe it's because of the area I live in.

I haven't lost any friends because of using this word once in a great while, because they know I'm not actually insulting homosexuals, like how people aren't actually swearing at God when they yell, "God damnit!"

It doesn't really matter if the meaning of gay now is homosexual. People are still going to use it as stupid when they think something is dumb. I don't know who came up with this idea that we should use gay as stupid, but it's there. And there isn't really much you can do about it.

[EddieV]

I used to say it a lot, though now I don't say it as much as I used to.

[oXMuhNirvanaXo]

yes I do some times ..

[*I Shot JFK*]

Look, kiddo.

No, I'm not saying they're invalid. I shouldn't have put it in those words. What I am saying, though, is that, when EVERYONE around you is fine with it, and ignoring it, and you're making a huge fuss, don't you think that kind of makes you seem a little mad?

I'm not going to keep talking about this with you. I posted that I use the word innapropriately, as well as many others. Why the hell are you getting on my back? I gave my reasons for why I use the word. No matter how much you disagree, they're my reasons.

As far as I know, I haven't offended anyone who's heard me use it, which isn't often. When someone comes up to me and tells me it really bothers them, I will gladly stop. What I think is that you guys are blowing this out of proportion. I don't think that this is even an issue, but maybe it's because of the area I live in.

I haven't lost any friends because of using this word once in a great while, because they know I'm not actually insulting homosexuals, like how people aren't actually swearing at God when they yell, "God damnit!"

It doesn't really matter if the meaning of gay now is homosexual. People are still going to use it as stupid when they think something is dumb. I don't know who came up with this idea that we should use gay as stupid, but it's there. And there isn't really much you can do about it.

dont patronize. its a waste of energy, and reflects badly on you

im getting on your back because i find it distasteful. i am well aware that this is your view, and you are entitled to express your view. i am equally entitled to tell you that i think that it is a load of sh*t. in the nicest possible way, of course. oh honestly, as if its personal.

and do i appear to be the only one in this thread who finds it objectionable? and if i appear mad, i consider i have good reason for my madness.

and i still dont understand is this: if you are willing to stop if someone tells you it bothers them, then why wait? why not just find somethign which doesnt make you sound ignorant and misguided?

people will use it. and i, personally am incapable of stopping it in the broad scale. but if, by harassing people who use it around me, i can stop them using it, i will continue to do so. i've stopped at least two of my friends saying it, and that is reason enogu for me to keep harassing you, or anyone else who cares to have this conversation with me, or who i hear or see use it inappropriately.

[flc]

dont patronize. its a waste of energy, and reflects badly on you

im getting on your back because i find it distasteful. i am well aware that this is your view, and you are entitled to express your view. i am equally entitled to tell you that i think that it is a load of sh*t. in the nicest possible way, of course. oh honestly, as if its personal.

and do i appear to be the only one in this thread who finds it objectionable? and if i appear mad, i consider i have good reason for my madness.

and i still dont understand is this: if you are willing to stop if someone tells you it bothers them, then why wait? why not just find somethign which doesnt make you sound ignorant and misguided?

people will use it. and i, personally am incapable of stopping it in the broad scale. but if, by harassing people who use it around me, i can stop them using it, i will continue to do so. i've stopped at least two of my friends saying it, and that is reason enogu for me to keep harassing you, or anyone else who cares to have this conversation with me, or who i hear or see use it inappropriately.

Heh, I guess I will talk with you some more then.

And you patronized me as well, saying, "You're a charmer, aren't you?" Just to let you know.

I won't stop because I see no need to. I usually don't say it outside of school, where there are like, what, two gays who I don't talk to anyway. I could understand what you're saying if I was constantly saying it in a different setting, where there could be tons of gays around. But really. Rarely do I actually say it when a gay person is there.

It's just a three-letter word. I know words can be powerful, but actions DO speak louder than words. If you knew me in real life, you'd know that I respect gays as much as the next guy. Since people know this, they're not going to give me a hard time about using this word.

And why do I wait? BECAUSE IT DOESN'T BOTHER ANYONE I SAY IT AROUND. It seems to be bothering you more than it would a gay person, at least at this moment.

And do you know how arrogant that sounds? Especially with saying that you'll harrass people until they stop saying it? That sounds JUST like my Atheist friend who argues with every Christian around him, trying to get them to denounce their religion. I bet your friends stopped saying not because they finally understood it was wrong, but because they didn't wanna get anymore crap from you.

Let's say, for instance, that gays didn't actually get offended by the use of this word. Just because YOU find it distasteful, you have to make everyone else think the same way you do?

I know you didn't see this part of my post, because you quoted me after I edited it, but I'm just curious: Example: I could, personally, find your username offensive. I could say you're treating Kennedy's assasination as a joke. Just because I alone could find it offensive, are you going to change your username to please one person? Probably not. But I wouldn't keep bugging the hell out of you to change it. I would accept it and move on with my life, like that person should who got offended. They need to realize that a lot of things in life are offensive and they can't get their way with everything everytime. {Even though when I say that something is gay I'm not meaning to calling gay people stupid, like I've said 33586974 times.}

So please, just stop. I have full respect for what you're saying, even if I don't sound like it. But with me, at least, it's a losing battle. Go harrass those other people who also said they use the word.

[Jorge]

'this thread is gay'

[flc]

'this thread is gay'

You're being extremely offensive.

[x1049]

I don't really say the word in general, but when i DO say it, i'm probably not meaning the 18th centry definition of "happy".

gay just isnt a descriptive word that rolls off the tounge as easily as "dumb" or "sucks" as in instead of "that's gay." i'd say "that's dumb." or "that sucks." :D