I couldn't think of any other title for this piece as I don't even know what I am going to write. It just seems weird how life takes us on a roller costar ride, today I write for somebody I have never written for before.
Yes you...do you even know how much I hate you? I think hate is not the right word because it still doesn't express my feelings for you. You had no right to ruin things for me, I never gave you this right...yeah may be my ALLAH did...and you managed to do it successfully! I don't know what made you do all that and let me tell you this; it doesn't even matter...because this time I choose not to shed even a tear for you....because you don't deserve it or may be my eyes have dried out.
You can't even begin to imagine how much hatred you have put into my life...because of you everything has changed, I don't hate you for leaving me but I hate you for what you did after it. I hate you for what you talked about me and if you can read what I am writing ... I wish I could do that for you! But then what's the difference between a loser like you and somebody shattered like me. You have no right to say that you loved me, because for this you should first understand what love is actually all about. Not two bodies in bed. But the meeting of two souls...whom am I telling all this to. How stupid of me.
by the way after all that I still want to thank you, thank you not for those moments which made me feel special and dance with arms wide open or singing songs or just spending time thinking about you...but for those moments which made me hate myself. For those moments which made me take my own life. Yes I survived and I don't know why...may be ALLAH wanted me to listen more of your crap...fine...bring it on!maybe this would make me strong...how i don't know. But that is what my girlfriends say. how I wish you knew what you were doing and saying...but all that is hopeless and doesn't even mean anything to you or to me because damage is already done....trust me it feels so good writing all this down. today when I finish this piece of mine I decide to leave a part of me which lived for you behind...but I feel sorry for you, because even after all that I still believe in love. Love is beautiful and it is true! You just need to meet the right person who knows what it actually means... I won't stop loving...I love my ALLAH. I love my family, I love my di and most of al I love mi ama! You couldn't change that and nothing would.INSHAHALLAH.
I started it on a bad note but want to end writing good stuff... so that years from now when I read my blog...I should still hate you for all that but then feel happy if you didn't act like this I would have always been in dark and instead of crying for hours I would have been crying for rest of my life.
I guess there is nothing much to say apart from one thing I HATE YOU!!!!i will take care of my broken pieces and very soon fix them INHSAHALLAH...wishing you all the very best with your life and whatever you said about me...I pray it shouldn't come back to you...because it hurts! It actually does...