A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really great about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," was the reply.

"I'm actually 47," the man says, feeling really happy.

After that, he goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the order taker, the same question, to which the reply is, "Oh you look about 29."

"I am actually 47!" This makes him feel really good.

While standing at the bus stop he asks an old woman the same question. She replies, "I am 85 years old and my eyesight is going. But when I was young there was a sure way of telling a man's age. If I put my hand down your pants for ten minutes I will be able to tell your exact age."

As there was no one around, the man thought what the hell and let her slip her hand down his pants. Ten minutes later the old lady says. "Okay, it's done. You are 47."

Stunned, the man says, "That was brilliant! How did you do that?"

The old lady replies, "I was in line behind you at McDonalds."

lol, naughty old lady..eww

What a trickster.

Why would an old lady.. ..okay that's just creepy. but it was funny how she was behind him.

rofl that lady is sick

loL EWw ;p

ewww bad lady. bad old lady. but lolz.

some old lady is thinking dirty thoughts.

Tsk, tsk. Such a naughty old lady.

yuck, the guy was ripped off -.-

lmao what a nasty bastard

AHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHA. That was great.

LOL. that was hilarious

Lmao-theres a grandma joke like this.

snicky

HAHA, that's gross.
Dirty old lady

That lady is smart. =D

i heard this one before =) but its funnay

ew.......very funny but nonsense....

rofl watta idiot

sneaky.. o__o;