IF YOU HAVE A PERSONAL PROBLEM, HOMOPHOBES, YOU DON'T NEED TO READ THIS.


I need to know a correct and socially acceptable answer to this question. Very lately, I have been questioning my sexual orientation. For the last...Four years, I felt I was homosexual. Purely. But now, I'm not so sure anymore. Here's what I mean:

Males - There is a physical and sexual tension here. I find guys attractive. However, there are a few points about this that I'm not sure about. I can't exactly see myself living with another guy for the rest of my life. So that's a problem. Hi. Sex. Boom. Gone.

Females - This is a mentality and personality ed-ordo here. If I wanted to spend my life with someone for the rest of my life, to have someone to go to and to come to, it would be a female. But, I don't find the female anatomy attractive. At...all. (Sorry, Ladies). Having a relationship with a woman means one of pure emotion, and barely any physical attraction. Hi. Sex? Nah, love. Sex? Nah, emotion. STILL NO SEX? Nope. Gone.

This is where I need cB's opinion. I am not sure what I am anymore. It's brooding. Suggestions?

well, if guys are the only sex that turn you on, sexually, than you are probably gay. but not for sure because i have this book about growing up and it says that it is normal for guys to find other guys attractive in their teen years.

that is how alot of guys are about girls...but with you - guys. this may also point to you be homosexual. but being gay is not bad...well, to me anyway. i guess the only way to be FOR SURE would be to experiment.

I was pretty sure I was homosexual for a while (about 4 years). But I think being gay, lesbian, bi has more to do than physical attraction now. This is where my dillemma comes up.

I guess I have to agree with Frankie..on the experimenting. It's hard for me to reply to this, because theres really no straight answer to this question..I see what you mean though. But I think to have love..I think love is physical and mental attraction (thankyou Dr.Phil)..because part of love is sex. So I guess you'll just have to wait and see what hormones hit on what person. Maybe one day you will meet a guy who you can see yourself with in the future, or a girl who you can see with sexually. I don't know, this was a hard one =/, but I hope things turn out well.

hmm.. I suppose you have to find one person who can fulfill both of those spots. Whether it be male or female. Until then, I suppose just get to kow more people and see where it goes. Or you could get with a female body builder. That could do the trick

^ are you talking about the fact that you can't see yourself spending the rest of your life with a guy? well, i don't really know exactly what to say to that... maybe it is just something psycological. (i'm not saying it is but...that is all i have as of now.)

I'm desperate, but not that desperate yet.


True. Very true. Sex, I believe is the strongest form of affection for one another. Well, I suppose it would have to be. But then again, there are different aspects of it. So I am not sure.

thats funny -- hi. sex. boom. gone lol ---but hey thats reall true

Hmm I think you might be bisexual. IDK im just guessing from what i've read

Apparantly, there isn't only one way to be bi.

i think so too. afterall, youre attracted to both. kind of.

that's a lot like me, with the whole "Hi. Sex. Boom. Gone." thing except with women for me...i wouldn't want to live with a woman or carry on a relationship with one because i love my boyfriend and i want to marry him and etc etc.

maybe you're just nervous about all the crap that comes with being homosexual, after all you're attracted to men and not women...

but after all, you're 15 (i snuck a peek at your xanga) you have a lot of growing up to do...you could be nervous about looking at a nude woman...

maybe you're just bisexual, that's the conclusion i've drawn for myself

how about you actually contributing to the topic on hand.

I don't really think there's a straight answer to it. It's kind aof a hard topic to talk about. All I can say is experiment. It worked for me. But maybe, over time, you may attract more to girls. And spend the rest of your life with one. I could't see myself living with another girl the rest of my life, so I can relate there.

Sorry I'm no help or anything.

Umm...in this situation....I'd say you were gay.

No need to be off about it.

anyways, i have guy friend, who is gay, go through the same questions you are asking yourself. He was going through that time in his life when he was finding out who he was, and what he liked, and what he did and did not want out of life. He was ashamed, yes ashamed, to say he was gay to anyone at. me and my best friend was the first person he came out to. But even then he was confused because mentally speaking he still found girls attractive and had in his mind that a female would be the person he would spend the rest of his life with. On the other hand, he was highly attracted to males on both the phyiscal and mental level. In the end males was his choice. He actually cant stand to many females now. But anyways I guess the point is you have to go with your heart on this one. No one can really tell you what you think you should do because deep down you know what you really want.

One of my friends is going through the exact same thing.

I'd say you should experiment...Maybe hooking up with some girls would help you settle. Also, you are young! Give yourself some time to grow into yourself/sexuality. I'm sure by your college years you will be more sure and ready to have fun!

Ditto

Like other people said, try experimenting. You may never truly know if you don't try.

My friend is going through the exact same problem. So don't worry, you are not the only one going through this.

I think my prayers have been answered.

Thanks guys. I suppose Fate finds its way around everything.

care to share?

Uhh, I suggest you see a councelor because I don't really know how to answer that.

question: have u ever TRIED having sex with a woman? i mean...maybe u should try it n see how it turns out. but yea i agree that maybe u should see a professional about this. hard to say n e thing.

How would a counselor know what is going on with his sexuality! Besides he already stated that his prayers have been answered. Mmmkay, go away =)

I know you got alot of answers, but my cousin gave me the best advice and with best wishes for you, i pass it along:

You are young. Experimenting is the ONLY way you will ever find your answer, but in the end you may not even have an acuall definite answer, but you will eventually know what you want. You cannot expect to make a decision this early on, because you have yet to live out your life.

I will add a little more:

I have gone throught the same thing, and i'm in that situation where i'm asking myself who i am and what i want. Do i want kids? Am I really a lesbian? I won't know for a W H I L E, but in the meantime, i'm enjoying life and experimenting with whatever come my way (doesn't mean drugs though hahahha, that's no good for ne one) o and i'm only 17, so yea, if i don't have the answer yet, don't expect to anytime soon

Enjoy life! don't stress too much about something that you can't control unless you've tried it all. Just try it all and see what you want =] good luck!

Well very simply this is what happened.

I won't say who it is, cause she is here on cB.

Apparantly, she read the topic. I made it while we weren't so sure about what we felt about each other, and coincidentally, she happened to bump into this. She had feelings for me, not knowing what I looked like, or imperfections that I was subject to, only the things that I have told her and what she has read. So apparantly, we talked about it. How sexuality is an interesting factor. Before I met her, I was pretty locked on Homosexuality. The possibility of me being with a woman, and the fact that I could enjoy life as a normal person, didn't come up until then. But when certain feelings come into place, when certain things came up and molded a bond without the connection of factor, it stands out.

Apparantly, after she read, she had no new opinions about me. We both agreed that a relationship can truly be based off something emotional, that sexuality is just another factor that can be overidden by the feelings for one another.

Small things shouldn't hold something big like love back. Even if sometimes those small things may seem impossible to go around.

i think it depends what sort of relationships you have with females. if it's just friendship wise, then yes i do think you're gay. but if you dont like guys emotionally, then... i dunno

if you find guys more sexualy attractive then i would say...you're gay.

You shouldn't rush to define your sexuality. It took me two years to actually realise that I'm gay. Take some time to think

I believed Four years of wondering would come up with some answer by now, but I guess not.