AznVi3tGrl
Mar 31 2005, 08:43 PM
Well I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend... But i've been goin' out with ppl since 4th grade.... And i guess my parents don't want me to have a boyfriend is b/c they think i will have a baby and end up doin' bad things... this is not true... that's not me. i know what's right from wrong and i know when goin' to far is and i need to stop. I currently have a boyfriend and he treats me great but my dad now doens't allow any boys callin' my house anymore defitnally him b/c my dad heard him say " I love you " and i got caught... I am still with this guy and i just dunno what to tell my parents it's just sad and confusing for me to keep hiding these things from him... I need a boy their to comfort me and be loved and i love him back alot but i ono how to tell my parents...
how can i get this through to my parents? so they will allow me to have boyfriends?
tmauze
Mar 31 2005, 08:47 PM
i've never had that problem. the best advice i could give you is just to tell them exactly how you feel.
lovescream
Mar 31 2005, 09:15 PM
I had that problem. Acutally, it was just a guy FRIEND. And my mom's overprotective just like your dad.
So if you run into this situation, my best suggestion is to tell them the truth. If you're the girl who lies to your parents, just say, that it was a joke. He's just a guy FRIEND nothing is going on between us! Again, it was just a joke. And act calm about it.
If not, then be honest. If you know you're a good girl, and they don't, you should just explain to them how you are who you are and not the girl that they think you are.
Looow
Mar 31 2005, 09:24 PM
Most parents will not change their mind about this.
No matter what you tell them. they will keep that rule
mzkandi
Mar 31 2005, 09:25 PM
talk to them and tell them to please loosen up. but since your staying in their house they can make any rules they want and if you dont like them then your just gonna have to deal with it...tough cookie but some parents are like that
AznVi3tGrl
Mar 31 2005, 09:35 PM
QUOTE(Spiritedfreak @ Mar 31 2005, 9:15 PM)
I had that problem. Acutally, it was just a guy FRIEND. And my mom's overprotective just like your dad.
So if you run into this situation, my best suggestion is to tell them the truth. If you're the girl who lies to your parents, just say, that it was a joke. He's just a guy FRIEND nothing is going on between us! Again, it was just a joke. And act calm about it.
If not, then be honest. If you know you're a good girl, and they don't, you should just explain to them how you are who you are and not the girl that they think you are. i've told my dad that we were just friends but he didn't care... I've been caught only twice with my 1st b/f and my b/f now... i've always had this trouble and now i think i need to do something 'bout this
ahhishkaren
Mar 31 2005, 09:36 PM
Eh, asian parents. 90% of them will tell you not to have a boyfriend til you're in college.
No1_2_NoBody13
Mar 31 2005, 09:40 PM
OK...so my dad dont want me having one either...he dont really like me hanging out with them either...but my mom is kool with it...i just hide it from my dad and i just came out and told my mom about me recent boifried (which i am happy to say she is meeting tomorrow)...i would say tell your mom first...you no if its a girls day out and stuff...just radomly bring up the convo. and just tell her...and maybe she wont be mad...
No1_2_NoBody13
Mar 31 2005, 09:41 PM
OK...so my dad dont want me having one either...he dont really like me hanging out with them either...but my mom is kool with it...i just hide it from my dad and i just came out and told my mom about me recent boifried (which i am happy to say she is meeting tomorrow)...i would say tell your mom first...you no if its a girls day out and stuff...just radomly bring up the convo. and just tell her...and maybe she wont be mad...
lilshelil
Mar 31 2005, 09:50 PM
OMG! ASIAN HERE! SAME THING! my parents were like that! they were like that when i was 14. I had a boyfriend n they found out through thier friends cuz thier friends saw me walking hand in hand w. this boy. When they asked me if its true i said yea, its true. whats the point of denying? well they found out and i was about to get sent to boarding school in england... lol so i siad to them that they can do what ever to me but im still gonna love him n we're still gonna be connected one way or another. and i promised them that im going to work even harder in school. (which i didnt). and i told them that there was nothing i can do about it. They did that silence thing for about 6 months... and i didnt c my boyfriend for 3 months no fone no online nothing. The only way we communicated was in a book that our friend helped us transfer back and forth since the fact that we're from to diffrent boroughs. Now, im 16 and still with the same boy for 2 years. And i constantly say in front of my parents how i got w. this guy n this other guy. They care, but they jus dont say anything cuz they know it wont work.
If u really love him. It wouldnt matter what happens as long as you 2 got ea. Come what may...
somekhmergirl
Mar 31 2005, 09:56 PM
i agree with lilshelil it was in the beginning of 5th grade and my parents are really asian lol.they dont belive in most american ways.hey wont even allow me to have crushes lol.they found out i have a bf and they said that i cant use the phone ofr anything anymore.and they took away my tv and computer.they trust me now but i still have crushes but no bf.so maybe your parents are different.im not sure.tell them you think its not fair and how you feel
aera
Mar 31 2005, 11:13 PM
QUOTE(ahhishkaren @ Mar 31 2005, 10:36 PM)
Eh, asian parents. 90% of them will tell you not to have a boyfriend til you're in college.

haha, true. i would never tell my parents.
1)theyd be "disappointed"
2)make fun of me
3) use it against me
if you really want to talk to them about it, just tell them how you feel. but i dont think your parents would change their rule, because thats just the way parents are
angelrevelation
Apr 1 2005, 12:11 AM
this should be in relationships...
try to show your parents you're mature enough and old enough to have a boyfriend... somehow... lol

you can think of things....
KELLYYY
Apr 1 2005, 12:24 AM
Same here. I never tell my parents. I don't know, just uh.. -thinks-
Whenever your parents aren't home, sneak and use the phone.
AznVi3tGrl
Apr 1 2005, 07:11 AM
QUOTE(im_s0_sp0ngey @ Apr 1 2005, 12:24 AM)
Same here. I never tell my parents. I don't know, just uh.. -thinks-
Whenever your parents aren't home, sneak and use the phone.
i do use the phone we talk for hours 'bout eh anythin i guess.... but my parents will never understand me and it just sucks they treat me like a lil' grl
HoodieObsessed
Apr 1 2005, 03:21 PM
I definitly don't have that problem.
my parents really don't care, probably because I don't have a boyfreind and never have, lol, neither have my two older brothers. MY two older brothers havn't had any girls friend that is, not boyfreinds

hehe, th'ats a disturbing thought.
right, anyway, if I Gto a boyfreind I dotn' really think they'd freak...I know if my brother got a girlfreind I don't think ti would be that big a deal, unless it became soemtihng big, ya...hmmmmm, that owuld be so weird if my bro had a girlfreind

I can't even imaging that..ti's jsut not him...
n3rdcuki
Apr 1 2005, 05:53 PM
[SIZE=1][FONT=Arial][COLOR=blue]i have the same exact problem! my mom thinks that i'm too young, its still love, it feels the same even when you get older, i think you should just tell upfront cuz thats what i'm thinking about doing but i'm kinda scared cuz they said if i ever get a boyfriend before i'm a junior in highschool then they're gonna send me to a boarding school in Utah or something but i think the best way is to just let them figure it out however they're going to and then when they do just don't deny it and they might not talk to you but its the best so you don't have to hold anything back when you talk to him on the phone or you're out eating dinner with him and you parents or anything[SIZE=1][FONT=Arial][COLOR=blue]
AlweizN4evah
Apr 1 2005, 05:59 PM
haha i totally had this problem too. ASiAN parents dont let you do anything. i know, it sucks.
well, im just turned thirteen on january 11 (yeah i know, im young

) and i had my first boyfriend on the 26th of january. i go to a PRiVATE school which means everyone knows everyone. (300 people TOTAL in the whole entire school) so of course word gets around fast and my parents found out. i just kept denying it, even tho id already gotten caught. i guess the time we saw each other at school wasnt enough 'cas we'd be on the phone together from 9:30 PM and until 5:30 AM
everyday.
LiTERALLY. thats how i got caught, but i kept denying it and i still havent told them i was actually with him. (we broke up)
so basically.. my advise is just hide it, 'cas i know what your parents are probably like and if theyre anything like my parents, youll be grounded for months. but its taking a risk 'cas if you get caught, like i did, youll still be in alot of trouble. im banned from going on AiM, got my cell taken away until 'further notice', guys arent allowed to call, and i can only go to the mall with my GiRL friends.
so yeahh.. its really your choice if youd be willing to get in trouble for your guy. good luck
..:loveee.NuTTii
Apr 1 2005, 08:39 PM
aha-me asain-ish (I'm Guyanese Indian) and my parents say I can't date till I'm 21. Great right?
You just show them your responsible enough and maybe they will trust you...maybe.
..:loveee.NuTTii
Apr 1 2005, 08:39 PM
oh shit...i double posted...sorry
ChEeR A HOliC Xo
Apr 1 2005, 08:47 PM
Tell them that you love him. And that they cant change the way you feel about him. And weather they like it or not, you love this kid, and are willing to do anything to be with him. Dont let them stop you.

i wouldent.
salcha
Apr 2 2005, 02:30 AM
well, you tell them that you're old enough to handle your own life.
i mean, what's gonna happen in college???
FracturedSilence
Apr 2 2005, 03:18 AM
Wow. The only dating-related rule my parents have is that I can't be alone with a girl someplace... Like, the movies. But I do it anyway, it's not like they're going to find out. Hm, oh well. Tough luck, kiddo.
AznVi3tGrl
Apr 2 2005, 11:25 PM
yea but my parents say that if i do something bad they will send me to a boarding school and things... and i don't even know what a boarding school is like... and my parents are justtt sooo strict and whoop me out of nowhere i've already been sent to a place where i have been abused so bad by my parents yea...
MissSwim
Apr 2 2005, 11:39 PM
im asain too... and my parents are pretty strict... i really wonder that our generation asains will be like... probably super rebelious
except its the opposite for me. My dad dosent care, but my mom is like "ahh! you dont like boys yet.. right????"
hide it.
Laotian_Doll
Apr 4 2005, 06:27 PM
why do azn parents act this way??!!?!? My dad says that I cant' date until i'm 60! SIXTY for gosh sakes!!!! And my mom, she probably agrees...but i would be so scared to date some guy like hanging around going places...cuz i swear, that woman has eyes EVERYWHERE! haha...they think that it would make me do bad things...like influence me into the wrong directions...come on now, these are the same ppl who think FRIENDS have a bad influence on you! *sigh* Geesh...I don't want to disobey them...but like you...I want a guy to make me feel safe too. And well, either date in secret, or wait until college...or where they can't have their friends watch you....
O x LiseE x O
Apr 4 2005, 06:31 PM
Honestly, I haven't had a REAL relationship with anyone that I'd actually cry about, they were more of best male friends. I mean .. I'm scared it'll interfere with my lifestyle. I mean half of my friends are obsessed with their boyfriends and it's sad and pitiful. For example my best friend [14], her boyfriend moved, and she hasn't gone out the house since, started cutting, and all this other sh*t...
xBEBE
Apr 4 2005, 07:28 PM
asian parents right? yeah, i can never do anything fun. cant even like a boy... cant go outside with my girl friends unless they meet them in person which is really embarrassing and they've flipped through my phonebook in the cell and saw all these boys names and they flipped out.
yellowgurl
Apr 4 2005, 09:14 PM
QUOTE(x uHoH iTs Lo x @ Mar 31 2005, 6:24 PM)
Most parents will not change their mind about this.
No matter what you tell them. they will keep that rule
yupp/.. i guess you have to be much more careful.. me and my best friends like plan out everything so that nothing would collide when we go out with our bfs..
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