Well, I'm new here! I'm Nick and I need advice on something. Okay. Me and this girl are really good friends. We dated for a month or two before she dumped me for my best friend, Jose. A month into their dating, and school is over, Jose doesn't talk to her anymore. Doesn't contact her. So I'm there to fufill the position as the guy best friend. I was dating someone then. We got really close in a few weeks and we were always talking to each other. Then, even though I wouldn't admit it, I had feelings for this girl. I didn't want to hurt my girlfriend so I kept it a secret for a while.

I told my best friend, Chelle, about my feelings and she said she'll ask if the girl I liked had any feelings for me. She said she could date one guy but have a small crush on someone else. She told me she DID have feelings for me. We confronted each other about it and everyone tried to seperate us from talking to each other because they were real good friends with Jose, her boyfriend, and good friends with MY girlfriend. But that only brought us closer. We started saying "I love you" and all that but we were still attached to our current partners. I broke up with my girlfriend because I couldn't lie to her anymore and I found out that she was just dating me because she didn't want to get hurt so she took the safe way, even though she didn't have any feelings for me.

I found out that she STARTED having feelings for me and I felt really bad, but back to the subject. I turned my attention, full on, on the girl I loved. She said she was going to break up with Jose soon because she really loved me. They broke up two nights later and I asked her out, thinking it would be okay. She said yes and we were all happy smiles. Tomorrow, I was talking to her early morning and she seemed distracted. Then she said she had to go. When she came back at night, she said she needed a "break" from dating. We were only together for a day when we said we loved each other so much for two weeks before.

I told my friends to ask why she broke up with me and my brother said that she needed a break from dating. But the bad part is that when he asked if she wants Jose back, she said yes. That confirmed my suspicions. A few weeks ago, when we were still with our partners, when we talked, we talked so much but when her boyfriend went online, she stopped talking to me. I started thinking that she was just using me as a back up boyfriend. Was I right?

*Second question. If it doesn't take you too much time, I need help with another problem. I'm starting to get over ^ her and I started being friends with my friend's friend, Vivian. She has a boyfriend, which happens to be my best friend, and her best friend likes her, which ALSO happens to be my best friend. We were inseperable the past weeks. We were like brother and sister. Except I started having feelings for her. I want to tell her but she loves me in a brotherly way. And my best friends, also her boyfriend and best friend, will beat me up. Should I tell her?

so much drama... its ok everything will be ok soon...

hm.. to think of, she probably was usin u as a backup in case she and jose dont work out... so... if ur getting over her thats great dont worry about it too much, these kinda girls arent worth ur time anyways


I always believed if u have feelings for someone u should tell them, it takes off the burden off ur back and u feel much more relaxed.. i think u should tell her but like tell her that u also hope after u tell her, u guys are still as close as u are now... and if her best friend/boyfriend or whoever beats u up... wait they're ur best friends too right? so if they do, they werent ur best friends in the first place.. by now they should understand that feelings come and go, and u cant stop it and u cant control it

WHoa...there!!

I think you need to get out of the dating seen! or Pick one! Its hard to keep up with girls cus at one minute they tell you something and another minute they saying something else...

how about getting a gf tht dont already have a bf?


also, it sounds like tht girl didnt really love you. If u just havent been getting closer to ur best friend's gf, then maybe this whole thing wouldnt happen...


just stay away from the taken girls. this may sounds harsh but ur only hurting urself. if u go after a girl who already has a bf, then its just gunna cause u more damage so just find a girl tht ISNT taken..

jeez, its not tht hard

Yeah, you're probably right. I'll try to stay away from taken girls. It's that whole "I want what I can't have." thing that attracts me to them.

Well, right now, the girl who was using me hates me for.. I don't know. But she does. I think it's because I don't have feelings for her best friend, Chelle. Chelle likes me. Vivian and I are still good friends and I'll try to tell her my feelings soon. When it's safe. Hopefully, my best friend who likes her TOO will understand and her boyfriend won't find out.

man, that was really long to read, but i read it all!!!! hehe sry. k, well first off it could be ya, you want what you can't have ^^, and that's totally wrong. You're stuck in this whole soap opera, and it's just relationship, after relationship, and you're not giving yourself time to breathe. take some time to yourself, and reflect. you don't seemto know what you really want either. get some alone time for yourself, and consider your whole situation. Also, stay away from people who are taken!! it's horrible, it ends up hurting, you, them, the 'ex', and the people around you....

lol even though i didnt read the other half, i probally been in ur situation before.... my advice is try to be in a normal relationship,because normal ones are usually filled with enough stress drama and issues ;]

Woah. Dude, you like your best friend's girl. That's not right. -shakes head-

I agree with mouse_3k. Stay away from the taken girls, and find a girl with no boyfriend. Or just wait for a taken girl to break up with her boyfriend, and go with her then.

ya, shes just using u.

yea, she was using you.

about the other girl, i swear, dont tell her about your feelings. if she doesnt share the same feelings with you, dont jeopardize your best friend and her relationship. and as for your other ebst friend that happens to be her best friend too, tell him not to interfere because that is going to cause all this drama. AVOID DRAMA. DRAMA BAD. You should know drama is bad since you went through all that drama with the first girl.

hmm..well you can tell that she liked you but not so sure of "love". and about the other girl, just don't even bother. you can see too much problems getting into that one already. a guy like you wouldn't have to worry about finding girls. you seem to be very committed and caring. hope you find a SINGLE girl and a good one at that.

Yeah, I really need time to breathe after a relationship. After I break up with someone, news gets out and one of my friends who are girls ask me out again. I really don't have the heart to say no so I just go along with it. I don't lead them on. I trust my best friends a lot and I have had little crushes here and there. I guess you could say I'm attractive (and conceited, as my friends say.) so girls just go after me without getting to know me.

I always like my best friends because they're the ones who I trust the most. Who I know inside and out. But they're always taken. Off limits. I won't tell Vivian my feelings, as you guys said. Maybe a few months after she and her boyfriend break up, I'll tell her. Lol. I feel like my life is one big soap opera.

slow down wid tha luv part lay low

LOTS of drama...idk if i can help tho sorri

sorry to say but yeah, she was using you as a back up......i feel bad, sorry

second, i wouldnt tell her, try to sort out your emotions before telling her becuase maybe you love her in a sisterly way

Good Luck!

aaah sry... i only help ppl who dnt write a lot

thats a mouthfull.

um, try not mixing up friendships with relationships. once in a while a good friend can be a good signifcant other..but usually it just messes w/ the frienship if anything.

something to think about:
friends can turn into love, but love to friends...never.

<3 dani

Just move on and forget about her. She's not worth your time just like anyone else said. Maybe you have a hard time moving on like I do...

the story is so confusing.
it might help if you put names for all the she`s and he`s.

anyways.
get over the first girl. what a whore. i know its hard to get over someone you loved for a long time. but trust me. you will eventually get over it. try not to spend time with them.. if your brain thinks "i wanna go out and chill with her" push it away and spend time with people who really love you and won't use you. you'll find yourself wondering.. "why did i even like her in the first place?"

goodluck.
=)


ps. and don't get another girlfriend unless you're FOR SURELY over someone. that will seriously screw up the relationship. badly. (trust me. i know from expierience)

Sounds like she was sort of using you..Just take some time off the dating, I guess.