Anybody know any funny pick up lines?
Tell me your favorite ones.

Here are my favorite:

- Let's play house. You be the door and I'll slam you.
- The word of the day is "leg". How's about we go to my place and spread the word?

:D

oh man, i had this friend who came to school everyday with a new pick-up line. and he was a nerd. it was soooo fxcking hilarious.

- "do you have a band-aid? because i scraped my knees falling for you." dry.
- "if i was an endoplasmic reticulum, how would you want me: smooth or rough?" dry.
- "baby i'll be your asymptotes so i can shape your curves." dry.

Drank wit your boy.

Haha, that is great.

I thought it was "...you be the door and I'll bang you."

Um... "You be Dairy Queen and I'll be Burger King. You treat me right and you can have it your way." Or something like that. I don't remember.

Nice tits, let's f**k.

i think i like tung's the best.

Nice shoes, wanna f**k

"wanna get some pizza and f**k?"....."What, you don't like pizza?"

^

Come on, we need more. :D

My boyfriend totally used that on me. It's definitely my favorite.
It was funny, but I think it'd be way funnier if you didn't know the girl.

Hahahaha, yeah.

"my love for you is like a river
like a summer breeze that makes my soul shiver
one look from you is more precious than gold...
lets go get some bbq and get busy"
-fresh prince.

haha

i used to watch that show religiously.

LMFAOOOO, I love that show!

WOO! found one.


"Hi, will you help me find my lost puppy? I think he went into this cheap hotel room across the street."


xD

haha, yeah. i still watch it on nick at nite. lmfao
&ive been getting really into george lopez lately, haha.

LOL jazz.

Haha, yeah. Me too.
That was the best pick up line though.
Everrrrr!

"Hey, you should do yourself a favor and go out wiht [insert own name]"

lame..

im no fred flinstone but i can make your bedrock.

do u work at subway cus you just gave me a footlong

i didnt come up with these though

Hahahahah, these are okay but the:

my love for you is like a river
like a summer breeze that makes my soul shiver
one look from you is more precious than gold...
lets go get some bbq and get busy

is the best, hahahaha.

"That dress is very becoming on you.
Then again, if I was on you, I'd be coming, too."

'How bout we do some math... add the bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs and hope we don't multiply ' aha
'Are you a parking ticket? Cos you got FINE written all over you'

LOL!!!

hahaha, nice ones.

-Are you wearing space pants? 'Cause your ass is out of this world.
-I know I'm not a grocery item but I can tell when you're checking me out.

I used to look these up for fun (sad, I know). That's all I remember, though.

Oh wow, hahahahahaha.

Lmfao. i like the endoplasmic reticulum one XP

"If you were a burger at Mcdonalds, you'd be McBeautiful."

Stand still so I can pick you up!

Would you touch me so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?

Your name is Laura, huh? Can I call you Laura? Really, what time?

Too lazy to see if it was posted yet...
Nice legs, when do they open?

Ah, I love this topic.
Bad pick-up lines are my favorite. :D

"I'm like a Rubik's Cube- the more you play with me, the harder I get."

One of my top five.
I need to fill the other four slots. xD

Hey girl, wanna see how my dick tastes?

"Hey...somebody farted. Let's get out of here."

"If I followed you home, would you keep me?"

"Congratulations! You've been voted "Most Beautiful Girl In This Room" and the grand prize is a night with me!"

"Do you wash your panties with Windex? Because I can really see myself in them."

"Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

all mad corny



BUT


"HEY, HAVE YOU MET TED?" (how i met your mother)

Can I have directions? ["To where?"] To your heart.

(Close hand with nothing inside and give it to her) It's my breath from when you took it away (open palm while saying this).

Did you have Campbell's soup today? (she answers yes/no) Because you're lookin' mmm... mmm... good!

Excuse me miss? You dropped something back there? (As you look around you ask "where") Over there! (Ask again: "What did I drop?") He answers back: My jaw!

^cute

1. Baby, Are you tired cause you have been running through my mind ALL day!(Fresh Prince)

2. if i rearranged the alphabet i'd put U and I together.(corny)

3. Pardon me miss, I seem to have lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?

4. Good thing I have library card.
Cause I'm checking you out!

5. Are those space pants cuz your butt is outta this world.(someone already said that one)

6. If women were boogers I'd pick you first!(Funny but I hope no one ever uses it.haha)

Do you have a ninja in your pants? 'Cause your butt is kickin'!

Do you have a map? Because I'm lost in your eyes.

lol, I feel bad for the people who actually use these...

hahha.

" i never tried chicken before, want to treat me to some cock ?"
" do you have a mirror in your pocket? because i see myself in your pants. "
" my love for you is like diarrhea, i can't control it. "
" i wish i was cross eyed so i can see you double. "
" baby did you fart? because you blow me away. "

=]

"Okay, so I came over here to ask you to dance, but I'm kind of concerned. I mean, we could hit it off really well, end up having a few drinks, next thing you know you're giving me your number because I'm too shy to ask for it, I finally get up the nerve to call and we take in a movie, have some dinner, I relax, you relax, we go out a few more times, get to know each other's friends, spend a lot of time together, then finally have get past this sexual tension and really develop this intense sex life that is truly incredible, decide our relationship is solid and stable, so we move in together for a while, then a few months later get married, I get a promotion, you get a promotion, we buy a bigger house. You really want kids, but I really want freedom, but we have a kid anyway, only to find that I am resentful, the sparks start to fade and to rekindle them we have two more lovely kids, but now I work too much to keep up with the bills, have no time for you, you're stressed and stop taking really good care of yourself, so to get past our slow sex life and my declining self-confidence I turn to an outside affair for sexual gratification. You find out because I'm careless and a lousy liar, you throw me out (justifiably so) and we have to explain to the kids why mommy and daddy are splitting up. That's just too sad. Think about the children. For God's sake, if you dance with me and we hit it off, let's just keep it sexual, because we both know where it's going."

^That is wayy too long to be a pick up line.


Guy: Hey, can you hold this for me? (digs into pocket and holds out fist)
Girl: Okay. (Opens palm under fist)
Guy: (Releases fist and holds the girls hand) Okay, let's go.

Guy and girl standing side by side
Guy: Hey, if you were a pirate, would your parrot be on this shoulder (hand closest to girl touches the girl's shoulder closest to the guy) or this shoulder (guy drapes arm around the girl)?

"Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"

"I want to be DNA helicase so I can unzip your genes/jeans."