The following is a partial list of actual written excuses given to teachers in the Albuquerque Public School System by parents:
Dear School: Please excuse John from being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.

Please excuse Dianne from being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

Please excuse Johnnie for being. It was his father's fault.

Chris will not be in school because he has an acre in his side.

John has been absent because he had two teeth taken off his face.

Excuse Gloria. She has been under the doctor.

Lillie was absent from school yesterday because she had a going over.

My son is under the doctor's care and should not take fizical ed. Please execute him.

Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hit in the growing part.

My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent this weekend with the Marines.

Please excuse Joyce from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday she fell off a tree and misplaced her hip.

Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

Maryann was absent Dec. 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache, and upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low-grade fever. There must be the flu going around, her father even got hot last night.

Please excuse Blanche from jim today. She is administrating.

George was absent yesterday because he had a stomach.

Ralph was absent yesterday because he had a sore trout.

Please excuse Sara for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

Please excuse Lupe. She is having problems with her ovals.

Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had diah(*crossed out*), diahoah(*crossed out*), dyah(*crossed out*) the shits





courtesty effingpot.com

LOL. The last one. Haha..

I always write my notes for my mom. And then I make her sign it.

haha thats the best one

LOL HAHAHA those are so interesting, and hilarious

Some of them I didn't really get, but the other ones were really funny. Especially the last one and the executing one.

the last ones funny

maybe it's just my sick mind. a lotta them have something to do with sex

Excuse Gloria. She has been under the doctor.

... just an example

some ididnt get but the last one and the one where it says in bed with gramps was funny!

Haha the last one was really funny.

I didn't get the Marines one though...

haha those are funnie..and yeah i didnt get the marines one either

ooo i saw dat b4. man it stio cracks me up everytime i c it

OMG LMAO

LMFAOOOOOO.. the last one was the BEST.. LMFAOOOO OMGGg im dying. i cant breathe.. LOLLLLL

OMg these are so funny! I love them :)

lol. that's why we should always double check our notes

AHAHAH!! those are my favorite. ovals? kekek

LMFAO!

hahah. I like the last one.

haha these are so funny do they really write those things to teachers lol

hahaha stupid people

Hahah...They're all so funny! Especially the last one!

The last one is awesome...

HAHAHHA, kids...lol use the comp for spell/grammar check. sigh.

George was absent yesterday because he had a stomach.

i liked that one..lmaooo

interesting, i should use those one day

ha, i always tell my mom wut to write when i need a note to excuse me from sumtin cuz, u know shes like a total fob.

Yerp! That's what I do.

The last one is funny!

oh goodness those are good. lol. i love the one above better =). lol i used to do that but were more realistic