Yen..
She wasen't worth it...
even after I said to stop..
she kept going..
How gay
can
you
be..
I
think
I
will
type
like
this
for
now
on


<3 Yen

well i did - and for your information i'm not hurting myself anymore
its the f***ing people around me who hurts me now. oh and also my bro just hit me on my head with something really hard whatever it was && now i'm bleeding.

geez how the f*** do you think i can 'get a grip' on things when i'm going through this like everyday????

now can you answer that for me?

Why don't you move out of the house or something? There's always something you can do - you don't have to live like this, you know. Don't let yourself be abused.

Taylor``

i can't & trust me i've tried like soo many times already. the last time i've done that was like three weeks ago.
i got caught by the police because my mom called - also the cop was the same one i talked to during school so he knew what was happening. and then my mom was like sweet talking her way out. the cops have no evidence that i'm abuse so they told me 'if this happens again'
theres a good chance i'll go to junvile because they have had enough of me.

i swear and like three weeks before my mom tried to kill me with a knife. because i said 'i love you' to my ex on the phone. she threw my clothes out of the house and was banging against the bathroom which i was in trying to get me out. she was still holding the knife and stuff. i never told the cops about that. ... i think theres no point.

arg now my head is like killing me - it stopped bleeding but i have like a major bump on my head now.

If your parents aint doin nothin about you can get emancipated, but thats kinda drastic. You gotta plan out your WHOLE future if your gonna do that.

Why didn't you tell them? I think there WOULD be a point.

Taylor``

i did i told the police everything they even have to have a strip search done on me - but my bruises were gone

its not right 100% - they say 'your 14, its just teenage drama'

but its not! never once has it been - its happen so many times already!
how can you just leave it like that - it makes no sense, never...ever...has that ever made any sense, of how thats teenage drama

f**k them.. if I were you, I'd kick them and punch them and scream at the top of my lungs. Try that.

Taylor``

umm i did that too - everything is just like terrible

also does anyone here have any tip on how i can get rid of this bruise/bump on my head. its been there since yesterday because of my brother - and nothings working its like killing me..

yea...it sux because i really can't do anything because of my age.

To angelina:Ok im not afraid to call some of you a bunch of idiots.What am i aposed to be afraid?no boo.Second if you wanna argue then pm eachother dont post in the forum where the girl asked for help.Because then it becomes way off topic.

To mystikmiko
-Ok if you want to get out of it,pack your sh-t and leave the house.Thats my advice to you.Dont take it no more,and if your brother keeps f-king with yu and yur parents dont do anything take a knife and stab the sh-t out of him.Stand up for your self.Dont take it no more.It seems like because of whats happening your putting your self down.Run away,go to a friends house,but im saying this now if your brother made you bleed.Dont just stay there letting it happen.Because then it wont stop at all and it will run continously until you do something

Well finally the arguement stopped. (Well I am now suspecting you two did in on purpose to provide entertainment to cheer the girl up.)

Well anyways, the police in your country doesnt seem to be so good. Well may sound stupid but, try to run to the police station and show them your wounds immediately after you get beaten and if the police ignores that, I can only conclude that your country shall be obliberated when Im in power.

Anyway, its good that you stop cutting (hurting yourself never helps) Well, to be honest, in these kind of situations we cant offer you much help. But I guess it will help to remember this:

The present will become the past



BTW: which country do you live in?

thank you for advice i'll keep that within my thoughts daily.

i live in the united states

I suggested that :)

To the original poster: Is there really nothing that you can do? Absolutely nothing?

Taylor``

no - theres no proof of any evidence that what i tell him is true except the cuts/scars i have on my arm.
my friend tried helping me out here - but it was to late. i justed wished i had told early :[

Uh why dont you take pictures of your "bruises". & show them to the police. Im sure if you have repeatedly went to the police they would notice somethin is going on, if you ranaway & accused your parents of abuse im sure they would believe you. And also if your hurting so bad im sure you could find a way to make someone believe you. ---
as for you brother isnt he younger then you ? Why dont you hit him ?

This whole story just doesnt seem real to me. Cutting your self..most cutters dont tell anyone they cut unless there trying to get attention. First its about cutting now its about your parents abusing you. Well if you can take the pain of slicing up your wrists then why cant you take the pain of somthing hitting your head? You say your heas hurts...while you were slicing up your wrists was you thinking about how that is hurting you ?

i've stopped cutting myself a long time ago. i just have the scars to prove them that i'm right and to others thats its no good what-so-ever. and yes i have learned - cut is bad especially to what is happening.
i dont own a camera and dont have the money to even buy those dispoable ones either.
yes my brother is younger than me - but i dont dare get him hurt- my parents might do something to me if i did.

i know when i wrote this i really didnt believe what was really happening. but to tell you the truth this is 110% real. non the less i am not lieing.

^ If you don't own a camera, how did you get up all those pictures on myspace? Hmm?

Taylor``

oh that lol its the webcam - but its not clear enough to take the pics i've tried today with my scar - see:




see its not clear enough to see - it looks like i've drawn it on or something :[

i'm osryy if that was disturbing - and yess its a heart.

Ah.. borrow a camera?

Taylor``

i'm not sure who has one besides my dad here - but i dont think i should try - its too risktaking

its a good thing my dad doesnt get home till like 11pm here...though i've been dead if if caught me writing this stuff

I've been through this multiple times with my mother and her ex-husband.

Police don't listen, you're right. And more often than not they toss you aside thinking that you just got scolded and are crying over it. Then there's the factor of, "A mother can discipline her child by spanking them or a slap on the hand."

But from the sounds of it, it's definitely more than that.

You need to sit down and talk with someone. Whether it be another family member, a close friend, a counselor, a police officer, or even a DCFS case worker. You've said that you've done everything you could, but the truth is; if you had, you wouldn't be in that house any longer.

If things continue to get worse, please do call someone involved with DCFS. Take picture with your webcam cos from the looks of it; the scars, bruising, cuts, etc WILL show up in different lighting. So do whatever you can to make the area around you brighter.

If you need help with anything. Like how to contact DCFS or just need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me. Or my AIM SN is in my profile.

-Jen.

thank you - and yes thats true. thats what the police have told me. the first day when they founded out because my friend told my principal of the happening - the DCFS got into it. and my parents were charged for the abuse. and as of now have paid for it. the week after was supose to be the week my siblings and I were to be placed into a Foster Home. but my uncle wanted to file a lawsuit for him to keep us - but failed.

a day after my parents gained back the trust of the officers and now i'm back here. i don't know what they did but yeah.
i think basical the police thought i just hurt myself because i told them that i like to play tough sports like tackle football and offend fall off my bike. but the fact is i've hadnt even joined any this past year.

my siblings don't get abuse - brother, and two sisters all younger than me by a good 9 years.
really they said, 'if this was abuse - the others would've been hurt.'
i can't talk back - so really...i dont know

DCFS doesn't give trust back like that. So either you have a misunderstanding, or there's a glitch in.. something.

As for your parents only abusing you;
Have you given them a reason to? Do you mock them/talk back to them when they say something? - Sometimes people, and I've done it myself, talk back or give sarcastic answers without really noticing it.

But, yes. DCFS handles cases such as this where police can't really do anything but charge the parents for domestic abuse. And as I said, they don't give up on cases. They don't just randomly decide that a child is safe in an environment where abuse is involved. Perhaps, if this continues, you should give them another call.

Or call your local hospital and see if they have a number for a legit Psychiatrist, tell them what's going on, and if all else fails.. asked to be placed somewhere (Such as a hospital.) for a few weeks. See if that helps you a little and hopefully it'll snap your parents back into reality.

-Jen.

no i haven't - i was never really close to them my whole life because of this, so i really never talked to them unless they told me to go do something for them. like chores and whatnots. and yes i do them.

and what happens if i do - they'll just call the police again and look for me. i already have 'runaway' listed in my records already. and really hating the thought of it each passing second.

What are you speaking of? Being placed in a hospital?
If so; they can't call the police for that. If the doctor/psychiatrist determines that the situation is serious enough for you TO be placed into one, the police and your parents have absolutely no say-so over the situation.

the 'hospital' that the police told me that i would be placed in will be the mental one. they say that i might have a problem or something like that.

...but there's no reason for me to go there.

it hard - && really it hurts..a lot .

this is completely off topic and pointless. but it's bugging me. so, screw anyone who would like to bitch at me about it.

"Razors pain you, rivers are damp, acid stains you, drugs cause cramps, gun aren't lawful, nooses give, gas smells awful, you might as well live!" - Lisa

yes, that was in the movie "girl,interrupted", but it is a poem by dorothy parker. not a line written for the movie. durr.

self-mutilation isn't the key..talk to someone about it, because the most we could do is give you advice.

i'm sure all of us want to help you, however, we just don't have the answers. you really need to find someone else to confide in. someone whose close to you and can actually protect and help you. the most we can do is offer suggestions and give you support.

hang in there.

My friend cutt herlself,
then she became anorexic.
It's terrible. She needed to go to the hospital over five times,
to get special help. Cutting isn't the way out...
talk to someone, your bestfriend?
try seeing a therapist.

yes this is totally off topic - but i just need advice

also now there are more problems...but it'll take to much to type & i wouldnt want to worry ppl. yes talking to others help but my bestfriend is mad of me because i ranaway..so idk

Cutting..Man =[
cutting isnt the key.
My gf does it and one time she did it infront of me.
It made me cry =[

yes i'm very sorry

i dont know why but i find relief in it

since there are pages to this, someone probally already gave the right advice lol... here goes.

1. Stop cutting, there is no emotional pain on earth that requires you to cut yourself to get rid of the pain. Cutting obviously isn't helping, you still are upset, not gettin any better, so i really don't see the point of cutting, do you?

2. If your parents beat you till you bleed, you should really tell someone, like an aunt or uncle to see if u can live with them, and should report ur parents to some child abuse agency

3. All i gotta say is, its rediculous to act like this because you broke up with your boyfriend. You say you have no purpose now in life, what was your purpose when he was your boyfriend? We're you destined to be his girlfriend and serve him until you die? Please.... Breaks up happen left and right, build a bridge and get over it.

Talk to your friends relatives and other people who are available for listening and giving advice oO

try talking to your friend
if she knows what your going through tell her to try and see it from your point of view,
personally I would have probably run away or have gone to a mates house if I was in your possition, but if talking to her don't work and she's still pissed then she's not your best friend, in times like these you need a friend and she should stop being selfish and start to realise what your going through and that what you need now is freinds. someone you can call your best friend is someone you can always count on. my best friend Megan is always there and will always be honest to me about her point of view on what I'm saying or doing, that is a best friend.

The Cutting needs to stop.
you are gaining nothing from it, therefor there is no need, it's losing you too much blood and making you week and could cause illness witch wouldn't be much of a bonus for you would it, being dead also won't do any better for you if that is what your aiming for, you need to show that you can get through these tough times don't give up even if there is no-one left to support you, but the thing is there will always be someone behind you, I've read a few posts on here and it looks like quite a few people here are worried about you so don't just give up.

Feeling worthless cause the guy you love has gone is also uneeded you could make things soo much easier for youself if you concentrait on moving on. I'm sorry I sound so heartless, I can't imagen what it must be like, it will take a long time in healing over thats why it needs you concentration. breaking up with someone is like a big deep painfull cut, it takes time to heal you just need to try and get on with things as if it was never there at the start.

try keeping a diary to record all of this and use it as evidence maybe or if you don't want to tell anyone about anything it's good to keep a diray as an outlet. I have a diary and once I've writen in it I feel much better it's like I've told someone but I havn't and it helps you resolve the problem if you look at it on paper.

I hope this helps I can't even begin to think about what you going through

yes thank you i'll keep that in mind :]

I hope everything turns out well with you... = ]

Do you have a friends house that you can goto... :/ maybe to get away from your parents... like a really close friend... soemone who has parents that care for you...thats what I do when I can't tell my parents something... i talk to my friend grace's mom :]... maybe you could get out for a while by going to your friends house for a week or something... then maybe call your parents and ask them if you guys can talk about it. sometimes people just need time away from eachother just to give eachother the ablility to think about what is going on...

Talk to an adult you can trust, like your school guidance counsoler[sp?]
Keeping it all bottle up to yourself isn't gonna help you in anyway. You needa tell someone about this mental/physical pain you're going through. As for talking to your guidance counsoler, they can always help you and try to get you the help you need, such as find you a safe place where you can live so you're parents don't hit you till the point you bleed.

Ugh, cutting is not emo. Emo is a stupid sterotype. Cutting is an actual diagnosed problem. It can be caused by many real illnesses such as depression. Saying that vutters are emo is like saying that the black kid is "ghetto".

Sorry, had to say that.

if you are getting abused by your parents you should really tell someone. Don't cut your self. i know what your going through is probably worser that cutting your self, but you don't have to resort to that do you? almost everyone goes through a hurtful relationship, but you just gotta pick yourself back up. there are plenty of guys out there.

there are more fish in the sea right?

haha yes there are. i met this one guy on myspace, amazingly were going to be in the same grade and school and everything. lol - he wants us to meet together at the mall and stuff but idk, lol! i can't wait though - also i just moved again....so i really dunno anyone lol. i even thinks he lives close by too, lol!

and yes i have tried talking to a lot of ppl, no help really....
also my dad isn't getting any better, he has all these burts of anger coming everyday. always yelling for no reason too, he ends up throwing stuff...even though he's my father - he has never helped me on anything...its sad to say that i'm even scared of him.

i really dont want to live here w/ him, but my mom is in a tight situtation, and for the time i have too. he 'dad' forced me too come here, so much for a choose.



haha yes there are. i met this one guy on myspace, amazingly were going to be in the same grade and school and everything. lol - he wants us to meet together at the mall and stuff but idk, lol! i can't wait though - also i just moved again....so i really dunno anyone lol. i even thinks he lives close by too, lol!

and yes i have tried talking to a lot of ppl, no help really....
also my dad isn't getting any better, he has all these burts of anger coming everyday. always yelling for no reason too, he ends up throwing stuff...even though he's my father - he has never helped me on anything...its sad to say that i'm even scared of him.

i really dont want to live here w/ him, but my mom is in a tight situtation, and for the time i have too. he 'dad' forced me too come here, so much for a choose.