I'm starting to think my "best friends" really aren't.

Ok my bffffffff Katie and I have been best friends since 4th grade. I had a hard life before that and she came alone and was my emotional support. She was my best friend who cared. Well then in 6th grade here came along Jordyn and they are basically the same person in different bodies. They even look alike. It's crazy.

Then theres Alex. Me and him have known eachother since like kindergarten. We started being friends in like 6th grade. Then Brian came along. Well So me Jordyn katie Alex Brian are all like a group. ok?

Today I found out they were going to Harry Potter and I said I would go too because I'm bored. Alex said he couldn't get ahold of Brian and he never called me.

Then I called katie to see if she wanted to do something and she said she had to go grocery shopping with her mom. I called later and turns out Katie had left when her mom was shopping so she didn't go. Katie is like the nicest person ever and never lies. Now the movie is over (I know because they have their cells on now) And nobody will answer there phones. Nobodys home.

We have this friend I'll call him Eric. He's super annoying and just argh. So whenever he calls or something we don't answer it. I know its really mean I feel super bad because now I know what it feels like. I just have a sense that they think I'm annoying and are treating me like Eric. I can't imagine my life without Katie, let alone brian alex and jordyn.

I just don't know what to do. I have depression and anxiety and I take prozac but things like this get me so depressed I can't handle it anymore. I've tried cutting myself but that didn't help. I think about suicide a lot. All because of these guys. But I really can't not be friends with them. They are my support. They are good friends when they want to be. And advice CB?

yeah, here's a hint:

talk to them about it. no use sitting at home crying about it and cutting urself up. all that does is screw urself over and all ur friends don't really know anything.

if u really think that they're trying to ditch u, then u should talk to them about it. if they're ur so called "best friends", they wouldn't do that u, and they'd be understanding.

and i'm not sure if u said it or not, but are u 100% that they purposely ditched u?

"I think about suicide a lot. All because of these guys. But I really can't not be friends with them. They are my support. They are good friends when they want to be. "

if u think about suicide a lot because of them, they're not worth it and they're most likely just causing u more pain.

and like u said, they're good friends when they want to be. that's not a good friend. a good friend sticks through with u from beginning to end. there's no, "meh, eff u today. i'll see if i care more tomorrow."

and u know, u can't always hang around with ur best friends 24/7. of course that'll get annoying, especially if u set it up like ur group of friends is a clique. cliques are annoying. especially if u emphasize it and want to enforce it as a group, and nothing else.

i'm probably just babbling on now, so i'll shut up.

^ i agree.
if they are making you think about suicide then they are definately not your good friends and ask yourself are you sure you still want to hang out with them even though their causing you so much pain??
maybe they just want a little space.

It's not just them I was a little emotional when I wrote that but crap like that adds to it. And I do talk to them, they just say I'm sorry. They say they want to be my friends and yeah. I guess I am just annoying. I just don't like being alone/bored because then I have time to think so I get depressed.