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Untitled, just a song thing-- STFU and read
ToxicTaco
post Jun 8 2008, 10:10 AM
Post #1


[Insert something Witty Here]
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Do you just like breaking my heart
leaving me to pick up the pieces
How can you say something like that
and then expect me to want you back

You were my everything
You were the center of my world
Everything I thought I knew
Falls around before me

If only you could see me now
In a world where pain is king
I don't understand how
I bought every one of your lies
You say you loved me
but now your with him
so what now
What will I do now
Just fading away

You were my Everything
You were the center of my world
Everything I thought I knew
Falls before me

Well I guess things never last
I only hoped it would
That we would be together
and we thought we could
How does it feel now
To know what you have done
I hope you realize that
I am more than I seem

You were my everything
You were the center of my world
Everything I knew falls before me

I wish you could've been
more like her
I am happy now
You still lie in the dark
Don't expect me to save you know
I
Know
How
It
all
goes
down
 
Be-Faithful
post Jun 8 2008, 10:36 AM
Post #2


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spam.gif That thing totaly sucks. spam.gif
 
ToxicTaco
post Jun 8 2008, 11:07 AM
Post #3


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why?
 
Be-Faithful
post Jun 8 2008, 11:09 AM
Post #4


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no rhymes
no originality
and this is a subject that everybody use
and it's bad written
and it's " gay "


I can make a better thing than that in 2 minutes stubborn.gif
 
shoryuken
post Jun 8 2008, 06:49 PM
Post #5


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QUOTE(Be-Faithful @ Jun 8 2008, 12:09 PM) *
no rhymes
no originality
and this is a subject that everybody use
and it's bad written
and it's " gay "
I can make a better thing than that in 2 minutes stubborn.gif


HAHAHAHAH.. loool.gif loool.gif

nicee... hahaha..

katalliztt u suxx... tongue.gif
 
demolished
post Aug 5 2008, 01:58 AM
Post #6


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I like it.

It keeps your thoughts simple and concise. it doesn't need to be poetic or rhetorical, but as long it expresses your thoughts and "get this crap" out, then that's all it matters.
 
heyo-captain-jac...
post Aug 5 2008, 02:07 AM
Post #7


/人◕‿‿◕人\
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Check any typical blog on myspace, and you're bound to find something like this. Although it is fairly well written, there is no originality here at all.
 
towntown2
post Aug 30 2008, 01:54 AM
Post #8


Mais je ne l'aime pas
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There's nothing that feels fresh with this.
The same old heartbroken theme.

The problem is that people simplify their writing so much that it loses all sense of poeticism.
Clear and concise is good.
Just don't go too far.
 

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